I'm pretty numb at the moment , i've suffered with major depression for as long as can remember , i think my problem has gotten so bad , i won't tell you how bad at the minute because i'll be typing all day, but i think a lot of it is down to denial , and when in the past i have acknowledged the fact i'm depressed i just wanted my doctor to wave a magic wand and make me better again . I've been really good at lying to myself , telling me , to forget about my depression , i'll feel better tomorrow , blah blah blah....
Trouble is it only gets worse , fuelled by the stupid idea that the doctor will make me better and all i have to do is wait for it to happen.
I realised after reading a few pages on this first session of this programme that in fact i am too responsible for getting well , i can't begin to tell you what a revelation this is to me....
