Welcome iloveshoes I resisted medication and the whole diagnosis of depression for years for exactly the same reasons you expressed -- I'm not sad; What have I got to be depressed about? Taking drugs to cope with my life is ridiculous and just another example of the quick-fix culture that I dislike so much. I had a multitude of reasons, and even once I agreed to take the meds, I didn't tell anyone, because I thought they would think less of me. Now, with the wisdom of the ages behind me :), I understand that the medication lifts and evens out my mood enough for me to approach and follow through on therapy... which is where I'm finally surfacing the things that led me here. As the others said, you're not weak. You're actually taking strong and positive steps forward by getting medical attention and by searching out help like this site. So pat yourself on the back, persevere, and the why will come.

iloveshoes. you are not week for taking pills, you have an illness that needs treatment and you need to learn to deal with it. Depression has two aspects ... a lot like diabetes. With depression you need the meds to help stablise a chemical imbalance and you need to learn to change some bad habits in the way you think. (a diabetic needs mdication to be able to efficiently use carbohydrates and needs to learn to consume/eat carbs). caimansbetty has a really good point. you need to educate yourself about your disorder. Panic attacks are fed by the way we think and it becomes easier and easier to become isolated ... I had learn to cut the thinking processes that make my worries into paralysing horror senarios ... which I now refer to as " my colony of gerbers in my head that escaped... and I have to recapture"... oh by the way ... venlafaxine is the generic form of the patented Effexor. The pharmacist sells it for less but makes more profit on it than effexor...

Hello iloveshoes, Welcome to the group! We are here to help, so please read through all the information and post as often as you would like. We're here to help! Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator

iloveshoes, You aren't a weak person because you take medication. I used to think the same thing (for far too long) and it just gets in the way of treatment and progress. None of what you experience during a panic attack is caused by a flaw in your character, I assure you. It's hard to keep this in mind, I know, when you sometimes just feel silly for thinking you are about to die at any moment without any rhyme or reason. I remember how idiotic I felt when I first went to the emergency room with chest pains and it turned out to be a panic attack. I thought, "What a wimp!" I think the more we learn about the disorders that trouble us (whether it be depression, bipolar, GAD, panic disorder, etc) the more control we can exert over our own thoughts and behaviors, and the less guilty we feel for having problems that require professional help, including the dispensing of medications. If we could all just buck up and get over it, we wouldn't use forums like this!

Hi wildcat! Thanks for your understanding, it makes me feel so much better knowing that I am not the only one out there that has experienced these horrific situations.

Hi caimansbetty ! The medication that I am on is effexor, well now it has been discontinued I believe, so I am on Venlafaxine, which is I guess the same thing. I have been feeling OK, but I do have side effects by taking this medication. But I am willing to deal with them. I hate being on medication. It makes me feel like I am not a strong person to overcome the attacks. But I just can't. I hate the feeling that I get when I had a panic attack, especially the feeling of dying. That I just can not deal with. Almost makes you feel like you are going insane.

hi iloveshoes, I have had generalized anxiety since I was 14 or 15 and my reg doctors saw it right away. He was the only one who knew about the horrible chest pain and the tingling feet and fingers. Later I was diagnosed with asthma but I think it was really more anxiety symptomes. I know how awful the first panic attacks are ... I was in the montreal subway when my first 10 rated panic attacked my wits. I couldn't breath, I couldn't think, I ran out and couldn't get to work and couldn't get back home. I could not walk back into that tomb the claustrophobia was horrible for a week. The next came with a severe bout of depression ... and I had symptomes of agoraphobia and social phobia. I was run-down from family and work and the season... I do not really think like someone who has phobia problems. I see the danger everywhere, but I somehow have the strenght to overcome the fear. IT IS NOT EASY! but I do, hence the initial diagnoses of my depression. since 2005 I have attended self-help group meeting for the anxiety disordersss. It has helped me to understand and work on many fear-reactions I had. It helped me to not close down and become reclusive. Now, my challeng is to learn about my bipolar disorder. Welcome to the site.

Welcome iloveshoes. What you describe sounds so familiar. How many of us who have experienced panic attacks ended up in the emergency room on a heart monitor! And what is it about driving that seems to trigger the attacks? Maybe it's because we need to be in control to drive a car and panic attacks are all about losing control? As for the diagnosis of depression, it seems pretty common for physicians to see depression as the root cause of anxiety, whether that anxiety is generalized or intense, as with panic attacks. Have you noticed a decrease in the frequency and intensity of your panic attacks after you started taking the medication? The symptoms of anxiety and depression and panic are often so interwoven that it takes some time to find the right meds.

Hello to All! I am new to this and I thought I would introduce myself. I am 28 going on 29 years old, and for the past 2 ½ years have been suffering from panic attacks. It all started in January of 2006. It was Friday evening and I was glad that I was on my way home to enjoy the upcoming weekend. As I was driving on a main road, all of a sudden I felt as though I was fainting but to be more exact it felt like I was dying. I somehow made it to the nearest parking lot and stopped my car. My heart started to pound so fast that I thought it will come out of my chest. This was not a regular fast heartbeat like when you have been running for a while; this was so bad, that I thought I was having a heart attack. I immediately called 911 and because this was the first time this has ever happened to me, I told the operator I was having a heart attack. As I was talking to her on my cell phone and trying desperately to explain what was happening to me, I noticed that my hands started to stiffen, to the point where I could not curl up my fingers anymore. Now I really started to freak out. In my mind I thought this was it, I was dying. I have never felt so alone in my life. I was in tears, and all I could think of is my family. When the ambulance came, my heartbeat slowed down. As they took me in the ambulance, they had no explanation on what was wrong, and asked me to go to the nearest hospital. I called my husband who came in no time to drive me to the hospital. As they took me in for a check up, they attached wires to my chest to see if there was something wrong. The doctor’s told me I was fine and to go home. I came home and felt extremely exhausted; all I could think of is sleeping. The next day, I just thought nothing of it and continued with my everyday life. It happened again a week later but this time even worse while driving on the highway. I was crying and praying and asking God not to let me die like this. The ambulance was called again. They told me that to them it looks like panic attacks. I almost started laughing….Panic attacks?!??!??! From what??!?!?!? After that the fear kicked in every time I got into my car. I was scared to drive to work. I avoided busy highways and streets. I did not want to cause an accident. I didn’t even want to go out. Anyway, I then went to see my doctor who told me the same thing, that I am suffering from major stress and depression. I was immediately put on medication to make me feel better. The thing that I don’t understand that I never felt like I was depressed. I deal with everyday issues and stress. But I am happy. I love my life. I have an amazing supportive family and friends. So why am I depressed and why do I get panic attacks? I know that I will never know my answer. But I have to deal with it. I am here for the support and I hope that I can give the same to others.