Ugh I hear you! It's at 530 tomorrow. Today I feel kinda up and down. I've noticed most of my panic attacks happen while driving. I guess I tend to focus more on my breathing when I'm alone in the car and then I start breathing quickly which triggers that numbness and tingling in my legs and arm and then of course an attack. I've been doing better at managing them and telling myself don't be afraid it's happened to you before it'll pass but it still exerts so much energy and makes me so upset that I still have to feel this way.
Ugh. For me it's the disorientation which anxiety brings that really upsets me. I have these obsessive thoughts of tracking my location to the cn tower. Why the CN tower? I dont know! And it triggers a full blown panic. It is so irrational but physiologically my body instantly reacts even though it's completely crap. God Im so drained mentally. How are you doing today? What time is your appointment tomorrow?
This group helps me so much. Every time Im nervous I think of you and everyone else who is also struggling and then I feel better knowing im not alone.
About your breathing focus, I read your comment in another thread that what if it lasts forever. I promise it wont. Just have faith in those ppl who have crossed the same bridge unharmed. I know you will also successfully pass this obstacle in your life. It requires patience and time.
Heres an experiment. I got it from this woman on tedtalks. So look at your environment and memorize how many red objects are there. Do this for 15 secs.
Now close your eyes.
Tell me how many blue objects you saw?
If you were like me, I didnt remember any. But when you open your eyes, youll see so many blue objects but because you did not put your AWARENESS on them but focused on red, you missed them. The point of this experiment is that whatever you put your awareness on, that is what youll see. I am implementing this and trying to be more careful in what I draw my awareness to. She also said view all challenges as gifts. Perhaps instead of demonizing anxiety we should see it as a gift. She also saif that if your challenges dont feel like a gift, its cuz you havent reached the end.
Also you are normal! So many people go through these things. But I totally get that feeling of why aren't I normal. I get it alot and then I try and remind myself it happens to alot more people than we are aware of.
I hear you! I always wish it was different. For me I think why can't I have a fear of something else and not breathing something that clearly has to happen 24/7!I hope everything is okay I'm sure it is. Youre heart rate was probably way up from panicking mine does that sometimes too. Just breathe and try and stay distracted until your doctors apt although I know thats extremely hard to do.
I'm doing okay. Still focusing on this damn breathing and feeling down about it but trying hard to push through.
I know. I cant help thinking what if mine is a harder anxiety to overcome. Like I wish I had your anxiety or driving anxiety or public speaking :( I always feel wierd and im tired of it.
What made things worse is that I did an ecg on the weekend because I thought I was having a heart attack and obviously my results were abnormal. Now I have to do followups because it said I have all these structural defects and apparantly I have a blockage. My heart rate was 165 because I panicked so badly. I dont have a history of heart issues, im very skinny, no cholestoral or diabetes and like I dont get it. Now I cant stop obsessing about this. Just wish I was normal.
Courage1984 I am so sorry you had a bad night! Just know that its okay to have ups and downs!! They happen. I feel like at least once a week I get those moments where I keep saying what if I never get better what if I am stuck like this forever. But remember what you said to me before?? You are living proof that you have gotten over this before and you can do it again!
Those dreaded what if thoughts are killing me. I keep thinking:
1. What if it never gets better
2. What if it stays like this forever
3. What if I commit suicide because what if I cant handle being like this forever (double what ifs :S)
Its 2.40am and im shaking, terrified, wishing I could leave my body but knowing that I am "trapped" makes me even more anixious. I know im having a weak moment but I cant help but curl up in a fetal position and raise my white flag in surrender. Im just sick of this. I need support but maybe my situation is not curable. Ugh. Again what ifs (what if my situation is not curable, what if I have a serious brain tumor causing these feelings).
Ughh. My mind is saturated in what ifs. Anyway Ill try to sleep ... or pretend to.
