Perhaps it's time to take a fresh look at those reasons for quitting and a review of what benefits you've gained. Sounds like you are still in mourning for the loss of something that pretended to be your friend and companion. It kicked you to the curb all these years but you haven't kicked back. As a quitter once said on here, like an abusive husband or boyfriend, you keep wanting it back even though it coated your lungs with tar, made you and everything around you stink, made your teeth and nails yellow, and made it hard to breathe.
It's hard to change habits...by which I mean, the thoughts that you habitually wake up to every morning. But habits can be changed. Perhaps when you wake up in the morning, if you have a sad thought, you can acknowledge that thought, look at it and say goodbye. See if you can change that thought into something positive, like "I'm glad to be alive today. I have so much to be grateful for." Even if it may not seem true, sometimes if we pretend, it will come true.
Depression sometimes hits us after a quit. Perhaps a visit to the doctor to see if Welbutrin is the right route for you now. Maybe talking therapy can help you pinpoint why you're teary every morning.
Rusty :)
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/13/2004
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 629
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 17,626
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2201.5
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 86 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 19 [B]Seconds:[/B] 9
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Quit Meter
$56,940.00
Amount Saved
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Quit Meter
Days: 672
Hours: 11
Minutes: 23
Seconds: 33
Life Gained
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Quit Meter
5475
Smoke Free Days
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Quit Meter
219,000
Cigarettes Not Smoked