Whynot. Congratulations on your 17 days quit. You are doing a great job. Smoking for many of us allowed us to hide our emotions. When we were angry, sad, happy, didn't know what to do, needed a time out in life, whatever the case may be, we would grab that cigarette and for some reason in that five magical moments everything would be ok again.
When we quit, we no longer have that crutch to lean on. I am a person who for the first year and a half of my quit blammed all the emotions I was dealing with on the quit itself. I was very hard headed because I do not believe a person should have to take medication to get through life. I still struggle with this. After a year and a half of ups and downs and getting to the point where I would sit in my room in the dark and hold my pillow and just cry and cry and cry, I decided I had to do something else.
I went to the doctor and he diagnoised me with depression. This was very hard for me to accept. At first the medicine didn't help. I still struggle with the combination of the right medication for me. It is a fight. I know exactly what you mean. I hate fighting it too and have often thought that if I just go back to smoking, I won't feel the depression anymore. The only problem with that is that I wouldn't be living my life. I would be hiding from it once again.
So I choose to battle the depression without the cigarettes. I read possitive inspirations. I have an awesome support group of people that love me and truly care about me (despite this, I still feel like no one cares). I pray, and am currently doing a bible study on The Lies Women Believe which is about depression. I am in counseling and we are still working on the meds. If we don't stand up and move forward in life, we are destined to remain the same.
The fact that you have quit smoking for 17 days proves that you want to move forward. You are reaching out for help and that is good. I just recently began talking about my problems and I'm learning how to move beyond them. There is freedom in moving on. Hang in there.
Take some deep breaths, take one day at a time and do what is best for you. You can do it!
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/1/2005
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 611
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 12,236
[B
