Fly
Before I comment in any way regarding your current situation, here is what I want you to do. If you feel that your current psychological state is more than you can handle at the moment, please, please go and seek professional help. You sound like an extremly intellegent and articulate person who is struggling with a powerful addiction. Please do not forget that many of us have used nicotine to cover other emotional issues that need tending. I am one of those.
As you know this is not any easy addiction to over come. I believe it is so because nicotine is such a seductive drug that it takes our natural facility for reason and twists us into rationalizing pretzels. We find reasons to smoke and then when confronted with the same situation again, we now know we MUST smoke. Then we take that situation and make it into an emotional template, so that when we are confronted with a life event that stirs the same emotions, our response is already programmed...LIGHT ANOTHER SMOKE...That is a general description of the cycle. And in order to defeat this addiction, we must not let this wheel of events spin out of control. Being addicted is allowing the cycle to spin unabated.
First we must recognize the cycle. Secondly, we must acknowledge that we began the cycle. Thirdly we must see that we have allowed the cycle to run on automatic pilot. And fourth, we must stand up take a good strong stick and put it squarly in the spokes of the wheel. Once you do that you begin to heal. Things get better not because you stopped the cycle once, but because you now realize that you have the power to stop the cycle permanently.
I know none of this is easy, but I also know that it is worthwhile. You do not want to smoke, there is a part of you that has always wished you didn't smoke. Listen hard to that voice and begin to recognize the emotional stimuli that cause you to reach for a smoke. Those are your triggers, those are the responses that you have honed over years of repetition. It is time to raise up a new skill set, that will counter the old. This is never easy, but as you progress you get stronger and one fine day, your responses to not smoke will win out over your responses to smoke. And when that happens, you will be glad that you did not fold when the going got tough.
nonic
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]12/25/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 173
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 5,190
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,211.00
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 31 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 8 [B]Seconds:[/B] 43
