I am soooo happy to see your post this morning Pokerbrat. This is the first thing I looked for! Look at that - 89 days. You can do this! Yeah for you! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]6/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 79 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,975 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $395.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 59 [B]Seconds:[/B] 22

Thanks to everyone for your help, and your kind words. Elderone, thanks for the "tough love", you may be right, I may be trying to set myself up for failure. I miss my addiction, I miss my smokes, they were always there for me when things went bad, which is often. I guess the only way I coped was to smoke, so my coping skills are damaged due to my addiction. Just another side effect of those little killers. I guess I need to learn how to cope with stress in a more positive way, no matter how alien that may be to me, nothing in my persona has "positive" attached to it. "Moving on is a simple thing, it's what we leave behind thats hard" My Mileage Smoke-Free Days: 89 Cigarettes Not Smoked: 4,284 Amount Saved: $854.40 Life Gained: Days: 12 Hrs: 22 Mins: 33 Seconds: 14

Hi PB, Your story brings back many of my own memories. I have traveled the road you are on now and it does suck and smoking won't help. Keep your quit it is the best gift you can give yourself. Your sons are making their own choices and are responsible for their own actions and even though it kills us we have no control over it. Stay close to the site and please keep posting and reading you never know when someone's post will have the right words to save a quit. Hang in there You Can Do This [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/21/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 162 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,240 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,053.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 22 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 2 [B]Seconds:[/B] 42

Hi PB, I have a son that has just come out on the other side of a bad drug experience. He did not attempt suicide, though many times I was fearful of that very thing. My son had a close friend that did commit suicide when she was 18; just having a friend that committed suicide heightens a teens risk of suicide themselves. Forget smoking..I know these circumstances stress us and our past reaction has always been to waste time smoking. I educated myself about teen suicide..it was very enlightening and enabled me to actually help my son. You have some incredible inner strength. You have not smoked. You can do this..care about yourself and your lungs/heart. Your sons need you right now...the new you, not the nicotine addict you. new me [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/26/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 95 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,280 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $475.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 13 [B]Hrs:[/B] 5 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 53

PB - You are one strong fella. I am so sorry that you have had so much on your plate lately. Don't you ever stay away from here. We are your support group. :) Hope things get better for you in the next coming days. Your son will adjust to boot camp and return home a better man because of it. Keep your chin up. Sorry I am not as good with words as others but I know that you can make it. ;) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/8/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 233 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,495 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $978.60 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 21 [B]Hrs:[/B] 15 [B]Mins:[/B] 29 [B]Seconds:[/B] 43

I know that "fish in a barrell" feeling, PB. Had my share of everyone taking shots at me and no where to run. Ain't fun. But you need to take a good look at those "shots". They are not at you. Your oldest is not doing well in boot camp. Not your fault. That's between him and his sergeant (or whatever). That is how HE chooses to react to HIS situation. I understand you feel responsible and the stress is making you want to smoke. Maybe you even view smoking as your punishment for suggesting something to your son that turned out to be a challenge for him. Well, he's there now and you smoking won't change a thing. Instead of thinking about smoking, think about how you can support and motivate him. He can use that way more than a relapsed dad. The tax folks have done nothing personal to you. You were not singled out. They are equal opportunity shafters and would be insisting you bend over whether you smoked or not. So don't. OK? Your youngest ODing is not a shot at you either. Like your oldest, it is HIS decision on how HE desires to deal with the turmoil we call life. Again, you smoking won't help him one iota. He needs you with him in support and love, not standing outside the hospital polluting your body and the air around you. I see titles to your threads and see some inner things you would do well by examining. One thread says something about expecting a rough 4 weeks. This one says you believe you should have failed by now. Come on, man!!! You're begging for failure, looking for excuses/reasons/crutches. Life happens and the only control you have is how you react to it, just like I said about your sons. Now, on top of all that life, you toss in a quit with all its inherent stressors and depressors. God bless you, PB. That takes guts. Take a look in the mirror tonight. Take a good, long, hard, deep look at the man standing there. Is that a man who runs from trouble? Is that a man who is not important enough to fight for? Is that a man not loved by [u]anyone[/u]? Is that a man you desire to disappoint? If you answer "yes" to any of those let me know and we'll get together on the messenger here (soon as I figure it out, lol). If anyone here gets tired of your posts, then they can go read somewhere else, IMO. You are not whining, you are looking for support and answers. That is what this place is all about. And you are right; if you do slip and fall it will be your fault, nobody else's. But you come right back here and we'll help you up and dust you off. Better yet, come here first (as you're doing) so we can help you across the slippery spots. ElderOne [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/23/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 828 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 16,560 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,924.72 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 151 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 33 [B]Seconds:[/B] 59

PB, You're under a considerable amount of stress and have done very well thus far. Keep going! If you can push through these tough times you can push through anything else that may come along your way. Remember that this will pass and smoking will not hurry up the process nor make it any easier to bear. If you need to vent, we are here to listen! Danielle, Bilingual Support Specialist

That is a nice villa you have Lainey must be nice! PB I sure hope you went to bed, took a shower, went on a walk, drank some cold water and whatever.... I was looking at your stat and boy you really need to stay quit. Fifty a day, wow that is a lungful and you what, want to put your lungs through what, again? :gasp: [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/22/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 584 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 10,512 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,212.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 106 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 42 [B]Seconds:[/B] 1

PB, you KNOW it won't help. You KNOW that you don't want to go through hell week again, you have read posts where people slipped and had regrets. I know you want your son's to be Men, set the example for them - do not cave, as Janna and other's said, be the example they look up to. I see success in you, in your posts, I KNOW you can do this, I KNOW you want to. Stay close okay? Sue [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/3/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 118 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,180 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $206.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 11 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 35 [B]Seconds:[/B] 16

By the Way, I just wanted to say, Do you know what a wonderful example you have just set for newbies here??? You have helped so many by showing them smoking won't help! :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/5/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 177 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 4,425 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,867.35 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 21 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 28 [B]Seconds:[/B] 18