You are a Quitter-In-Waiting.
“I am afraid,” you say. Your palms are sweating – funny, they never did that before. Your cupboard is stocked with things too crunchy, too green, too impossibly different from what you’re used to. You have hard sweets, soft sweets, twelve kinds of gum, toothpicks, straws and ‘nozzly things’ at the ready. Playing cards, video games, mp3 players and a stack of counted cross stitch to keep your hands busy.
Your palms are sweating. You are ready.
It’s zero hour minus a few days. You’re going to do this. You’re really going to do this. You’ve got the rest of the carton ready for countdown new year’s eve - when you finish that last smoke, that’s the last smoke. Ever.
You haven’t told many people your plans. You’re afraid of failing. This way if you fail, you haven’t let anyone down. Oh. If you fail you’ll let yourself down. No. You’ll not fail, you’re going to do this.
Go tell them. We’ll wait.
Done? Ok. See the green stuff in your fridge? Add a whole load of low calorie drinks, a few naughty ones and some comfort food and stop NOW worrying about your potential weight gain. Plan to drink gallons. Drink every time you’d smoke and you’ll be surprised how it peels off the hunger. Besides, you’ll probably gain at least 5-7 pounds. I think they call them pounds because they pound on your ability to love yourself. They pound your ego. Pound them back but learn to love or at least tolerate them, because they hang on. They don’t make much of a difference really. You think they do now, but when you’re jogging up three flights of stairs in a couple years saying ‘man alive this is so much easier when I can BREATHE’ you won’t give two monkeys about seven lousy pounds. I sure as hell don’t.
You are about to embark on one of the most difficult journeys of your life. Don't go into it denying yourself everything, you'll only torture yourself. It's hard enough, have some chocolate now and then. Rewards are going to become your new best friend.
Once you’ve cleared yourself of nicotine, broken the habit, begun to deal with all the technicolor emotions tearing apart your ability to function like a normal human being (sorry, reality check there), spent months on end being a quitter (maybe much of it a bitter quitter), feel at ease with the new reality, THEN you can start worrying about weight.
There’s too much at stake to lose your focus. You are a quitter-in-waiting. You are going to do this.
“I am afraid,” you say. We hear you.
Stick close, read, read, read, post often. Be ever so strong, mostly when you are feeling ever so weak. This means to cry. To feel blind fury. Maybe to throw things (at inanimate objects, mind you). To run til your breath comes in rags. To pull the cover over your head and ignore the day. To blast open the windows and see the next. To open that door and face the next still. Tough road ahead. Go get a hi visibility vest, you may want to really warn folks you’re on the way. They'll thank you for it later.
But still you are afraid. So was I, til that decision and this site saved my life.
Let 2010 be the year it saves yours.
x T
My Milage:My Quit Date: 1/1/2007
Smoke-Free Days: 1093
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 25,139
Amount Saved: �6,913.23
Life Gained:Days: 95
Hrs: 5
Mins: 16
Seconds: 51
