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I need help!


for 14 år siden 0 34 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I am fortunate in that I happened to have an appointment with a therapist this afternoon, who can hopefully help me put this in perspective.  
 
Sticking To It, you asked me several questions:
 
What good things have come your way since you quit smoking?
Better health, happiness, friends, freedom, self-confidence

 

Which on these things are no longer valid because of the one cigarette, which ones are still valid?
Well the happiness and self-confidence went down the rathole.  There are people on another support board that were hoping this would happen and they will be laughing at me for the next year.  

 

What prompted you to have a smoke?

A stupid drunken thought that I should be able to "treat myself" because I was on vacation.
 

Did you like it?

 No, it sucked.

 
What’s the plan for handling that trigger next time?
 Quit drinking.

What are your triggers and what do you do to keep from smoking when they present themselves?

 The triggers I still have all relate to treating myself.  I need to do a better job of re-programming my junkie mind to understand that inhaling toxic chemicals is not a treat.

 
Have you had a smoking thought this morning?
 Hell, no!
 
Lainey, you're advice is sound, but it won't fly with everyone.  There are too many people who will tell me that the one cigarette negates the 3900 I didn't smoke over the past 8 1/2 months.  It didn't, but some will treat it that way.
 

My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 11/22/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 260
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 3,900
Amount Saved: $1,365.00
Life Gained:
Days: 47 Hrs: 12 Mins: 31 Seconds: 56

for 14 år siden 0 3875 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey Wanttobefree2010; you have been given some good advice here. I understand the pain, we all do, we have all lost a quit along the way or screwed up somewhere. But if this was just a slip, let it be a slip and nothing more, take one day off your meter and call it a day! As Stickin put it, Look forward, don't look back!
Bury the carcasses of the past in the past, and leave them where they lie! You still have an awesome 8 1/2 months under your belt, use that to propel you forward to the next! You are an addict, so the lesson learned is this "I CANNOT SMOKE EVER AGAIN, NO MATTER WHAT! Let that be your mantra, as humans we learn from our mistakes. A slip is a little mistake. Don't let it be a bigger one.
Deep breaths, dust yourself off and be proud of yourself for keeping going on your quit!
 

My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 3/5/2007
Smoke-Free Days: 1253
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 31,325
Amount Saved: $13,219.15
Life Gained:
Days: 172 Hrs: 13 Mins: 36 Seconds: 31

for 14 år siden 0 1985 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0

If you do not know what to do, do nothing; forget about the perception of losing 8 ½ months.  Go forward and don’t smoke. 

 

What good things have come your way since you quit smoking?

 

Which on these things are no longer valid because of the one cigarette, which ones are still valid?

 

What prompted you to have a smoke?

 

Did you like it?

 

What’s the plan for handling that trigger next time?

 

What are your triggers and what do you do to keep from smoking when they present themselves?

 

Have you had a smoking thought this morning?

 


My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 1/22/2006
Smoke-Free Days: 1660
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 41,500
Amount Saved: $18,156.25
Life Gained:
Days: 324 Hrs: 20 Mins: 51 Seconds: 54

for 14 år siden 0 34 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thank you, Bonnie.  I know what you are saying is true, I just wish it didn't hurt so bad.
My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 11/22/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 260
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 3,900
Amount Saved: $1,365.00
Life Gained:
Days: 47 Hrs: 11 Mins: 25 Seconds: 56

for 14 år siden 0 1209 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
 Hi,  I had a relapse at 9 months.. because I thought... that I could socialize, have a few drinks, smoke and go right back  to my quit.   You Had One.. you had a slip..  This was a learning experience. you now realize that, at a certain limit of alcohol, your guard is let down.
 
 You smoked for many many years, We used smoking as a reward.. a way to deal with emotions.. happy, sad, up, down. etc.    Maybe you forgot to reward yourslef. to hold the quit close,  I thought I was over smoking and could have a smoke or 2 in a social situation .. with drinks.  Well I leanred my lesson, but I did have a total relapse and it took me a bit to come back.
 
Look at your stats.. you have over 3,000 smokes not smoked.   You made a mistake, you have learned a valuable lesson.
 
Please quit beating yourself up.. You are human, this is an addiction, and we are learning to deal with it.  You have done amazing.. You Now understand .. that this addiction is sly, sneakey and will try everything when our guard is down.   You have jumped right back up.. and said OMG what have I done..    You have NOT lost, you have gained valuable knowledge.. you know to keep your quit close, focused.. You are a winner
 
 Bonnie
 

My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 5/7/2010
Smoke-Free Days: 94
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 1,598
Amount Saved: $319.60
Life Gained:
Days: 12 Hrs: 8 Mins: 30 Seconds: 3

for 14 år siden 0 34 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Well, for whatever perverse reason, I just lost the post I had typed out due to a SQL error.  Yet another slap in my face no doubt.  
I am not going to make this mistake again, no way no how.  I just don't know right now how I am going to deal with the pain I am going through.  I have not only lost the hard work I put in over the past 8 1/2 months, but I am now looking forward to another 8 1/2 lost months making up for it.  Right now it just seems like more than I can cope with.  Yes, I agree with you, Leslie, I made a very, very stupid mistake.

My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 11/22/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 260
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 3,900
Amount Saved: $1,365.00
Life Gained:
Days: 47 Hrs: 9 Mins: 51 Seconds: 50

for 14 år siden 0 55 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hmmmmm this is really hard for me to post because in the years past I would say if you smoked one then you had to re-set your meter. 
In your case you've been 8.5 months smokefree and made (in my opinion) a stupid mistake.  A lot of us wish we could have made that mistake but we didn't, that is our addiction talking to us.  You need to learn that you cannot for whatever circumstance let your guard down and allow yourself to smoke.
I have been smokefree for 8.5 years and I still occasionally would like to fire up a deathstick.  But I engage my self-talk and remind myself how HARD it was to quit in the first place and that I NEVER, EVER, want to go through that again... and then I'm again so proud of my quit and wouldn't allow myself to make that slip.
 
You are beating yourself up (rightly so), so don't let it happen again, no matter what the circumstances are! 8.5 months is a great start to a wonderful quit, don't screw it up now 
 
Leslie 

My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 2/14/2002
Smoke-Free Days: 3098
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 123,920
Amount Saved: $18,588.00
Life Gained:
Days: 318 Hrs: 15 Mins: 38 Seconds: 41

for 14 år siden 0 1985 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Relax and I mean that!  It is not the end of the world sleep.
My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 1/22/2006
Smoke-Free Days: 1659
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 41,475
Amount Saved: $18,145.31
Life Gained:
Days: 324 Hrs: 18 Mins: 45 Seconds: 50

for 14 år siden 0 34 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I blew 8 1/2 months of hard work and I'm having a lot of trouble coping with that right now.  On top of that, my wife is upset with me and my son is trying to cheer me up by telling me I have been smoke free for three days.  I just want to crawl under a rock and hide for the next 8 1/2 months until I get back to where I was at.  I know none of this makes any sense, but I can't help feeling tis way right now.
My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 11/22/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 259
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 3,885
Amount Saved: $1,359.75
Life Gained:
Days: 47 Hrs: 9 Mins: 27 Seconds: 6

for 14 år siden 0 1985 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
grief, someone you loved haa passed on, how?
My Mileage:

My Quit Date: 1/22/2006
Smoke-Free Days: 1659
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 41,475
Amount Saved: $18,145.31
Life Gained:
Days: 324 Hrs: 18 Mins: 35 Seconds: 34


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