I have been absent from these pages for a bit of time now, and have not contributed to the wealth of knowledge and hope that is contained within this site.  However, I have been reading regularly and maintain a great empathy for all who struggle withthis addiction. 

When I first came here I was seeking a kind of reassurance that cessation was a possibility for me.  At that time I had a lingering doubt that laying aside smoking was not an option for me.  I did not realize then that the retention of that doubt was a symptom of the very addiction I wished to end.  Doubt and its brother fear are both tools of addiction.  It is up to us to realizethat fact and begin to extinguish the residual embers that give life to those harmful mindsets. 

Of course that is easy to say.  The difficulty of any task is in the doing. How one goes about throwing water on the inferno of doubt and fear is a matter for the individual.  However, I believe that there are a few general principles that can be used to aid us in that quest.

The three things that have helped me the most are awareness, acceptance and appreciation.  In order to recognize the nature of the task there is a need for awareness.  As smokers we have always been aware that smoking is a negative aspect in our lives.  The difficulty has been that that awareness, for the most part,lasts for mere nanoseconds.  The revelation is quickly overcome by the desire for one more smoke.  That is part of the circular nature of the addiction.  As we all know nicotine has a half-life in the body and just as we reach a state of awareness with regard to the negative impact the practice is having, the old cycle is renewed as the nicotine is drained from our bodies.  The light of awareness is quickly extinguished by the desire to begin the cycle yet one more time.  

Once we recognize the physical nature of the addiction, we must practice in order to allow our awareness to become greater than the addiction cycle.  In short we must recognize the problem, understand the cycle and rise above its workings.  How one does that is difficult to describe.  Some people do this through deferral, some find that deep breathing helps, others are able to identify the stimuli that trigger the desire and find ways to either avoid or alter their lives to negate those triggers.  The point is that it is possible and YOU  can do it. 

The second general point that I find helpful to keep in mind is acceptance.  Accept that we have fallen into a trap of sorts.  We have allowed smoking to become such a part of our lives that without it, social functions become unbearable; completing tasks always incorporates it, and even our sexual lives become less than perfect without its presence.  In short, as the old R&B classic goes, smoking "has really got a hold on us"..."I don't want you, but I need you...and so forth.  However, accept also that you do not need smoking.  In fact it needs you or at least the tobacco industry needs you for it to survive. You need to eradicate its presence in your life so that YOU can survive. 

The third point that I find useful is appreciation.  In the first instance appreciate that you have this chance to quit.  That is fundamental.  Not all people are given or choose to take advantage of the opportunity to leave smoking in the dust.  Even now I do not know if I quit soon enough as I smoked for 37 of my trips around the sun. Perhaps I have come to it to late, I do not know.  But I am happy and appreciate the fact that I have been given the opportunity to quit.  It is a blessing and should be celebrated.

Appreciate as well all that is in your life, although much of it may seem a trial, it all has its purpose. We all suffer in this life to one degree or another.  We all have trials.  We all have triumphs.  There are times when we are loved and times when we are despised.  There are times when we love deeply and others when we face disappointment and alienation.  The one over riding principle to bear in mind is that smoking will neither enhance nor diminish any of those experiences.  I think (and this is only me) that the key is to appreciate the whole magilla and wonder at the cosmic coincidence or plan that is the reality of human existence.  I do. In fact I think it is a miracle that we are here at all. 

stay well      

nonic