This weekend has not been good. I managed to stay completely sober for almost 3 months, but I blew it last night. I told myself I would not let that derail me; I didn't drink nearly as much as normal. But all afternoon today, I've been feeling guilty and now tonight, I'm dealing with wanting to do it again. I need to be working on a million things needing my attention. I only want to do one thing and that's all I can think about.
I promised the kids I wouldn't drink anymore and they went to a friend's house for a sleepover last night. The opportunity presented itself and I gave in. They are home tonight and I don't want to drink in front of them - they will be disappointed in me. I'm already disappointed in me enough for everyone. So I am posting here and reading old posts trying to avoid what seems to be my fate for tonight. If I start drinking tonight, I won't stop until it's too late.
