Lately I get nausea after I go eat out where there are a lot of people in the restaurant. It frustrates me because THE thing you do when you go out with friends/family is go eat. And I did like to eat before too, but now, I'm always canceling on friends because I don't want to go eat. I can't even go eat with my family. I also get scared at what kinds of chemicals are in the food that causes me to get nausea. I just want to be carefree again.
I woke up today thinking "Who the hell can wake up one day and suddenly be afraid of eating?" And right now I feel really angry and silly. Why on earth would I do this to myself? I don't want to be anorexic and I used to like eating. It's like I go through a whole series of thoughts now before I eat something and that's really annoying. I just feel so stupid right now. Sorry for the vent but I'm just so annoyed with it all. And every time I can eat I realize "Hey it's ok I'm not going to choke on it..." so why do I continue to scare myself? >:(