I totally know what you mean! I really don't like to talk about my anxiety and I don't really know how and who I should really tell except for the people who I know that will be sticking around.
Have you thought of ways to try and start letting people into your life? I don't think you should worry about people seeing your weaknesses. We all have weaknesses, and we all have strengths. Have you tried focusing on your strengths?
You never know, maybe people will surprise you with how understanding they can be,
Miki- Thanks for the reply! I have discovered that I really am lacking in the friends department. I have lots of wonderful people around me. BUT true friends that I can go to and be honest with all my faults and secrets there is only one and other than when we are at work together our lives don't connect and that is my doing not because she hasn't included me. I really hate this problem!!!!! The anxiety that is!!!! I am the one that keeps people at a distance....and I know why!!!! It's not wanting them to see my weaknesses. I don't want anyone to see them or know that I can't go certain places or do certain things. I am really frustrated right now.
My sister has had anxiety but our ways to cope is a bit different. I tell my mom and sister and my husband. My dad knows but we don't really talk about it. Many of my friends know I have some type of problem, but I never really had a chance to elaborate on it. It seems like whenever I do, they have their own problems so it's hard to explain for me. I guess I don't want pity either. I have stopped hanging out with friends unless my husband is there (which is only the weekends or when I go visit him.) This is because my friends live far away and I don't drive far away and I don't like to call people over because I live in someone else's house. But being absent from friends like this really has got me thinking who I want as my friends. For the first time I think I have time to think for myself also. But my goal is to meet new and old people alone again, one day.
I don't have a problem telling anyone about me and my "quirks"..lol.. BUT I choose to do it only if it's called for... or if it comes up in conversation or in a situation when I think it could help someone (ie. a girlfriend who had postpartum).
There are so many more like us than not that I don't think it's a big deal.
There are those that are judgemental or just can't "get it"...and those are the ones I just don't bother with. My parents had a very hard time understanding and that was a difficult time. How could the high achiever, super happy, wanting for nothing possibly have anything wrong... Shake it off... snap out of it... blah blah blah.. That's the crap I prefer to live without...lol...
It's taken a long time but my mom is supportive now... but my dad... he has a tough time.... personally it's because I'm like him and facing that would mean he too needed "help"... he's too old school for that.
It takes courage to share your stories and Birdie...if they reject you..they weren't worth your time anyways. You're the better person in that situation...
Birdie,
You are on the right path and your knowledge has helped you progress. Continue to challenge those thoughts and use what you have learned to help guide you. You can continuously do exposure exercises to assist you.
You have come a long way so be proud of your progress.
I only tell some people, if I meet someone and they want me to go say to a busy bar/resturant at the happy hour time, then I would say something as not to seem rude. I dont necessarily tell everyone I know. I dont want my friends to think i'm just not being social, I'd like them to know why I prefer to not go to a busy place and usually they are fine with it.
