You are not losing your mind! Yes, I removed it. I originally thought you were referring to volunteer work with veteran affairs but then I read another post and realized you were not and removed it.
Thank you for your response..I really hard a time remembering what volunteer work you are talking about. Are you talking about the quilt blocks I am thinking about making? This is something I have been thinking about doing but haven't done yet.
I have missed my quilting class for the last three weeks while we have been working on the fence. I need to get back to class to make the connections and talk to the people in class that are involved in making these quilts if I want to do this..I find I am afraid of letting my self feel all the feeling I will be feeling while I am making these blocks. When I look at all the patriotic fabrics it makes me feel both happy and sad. It is very bitter sweet for me. I think making these quilts may be very healing for me and also for those that receive them..I am not sure what I am going to do at this point..I am afraid of having another melt down like I had yesterday and am still feeling very raw from it all...
I just went back and read you post again and now the part about the volunteer work is gone..Did you remove it? Did I imagine it? am I losing my mind?
I am sorry yesterday was difficult for you but I love your attitude and how you rewarded yourself. It sounds like you are going through a cleansing and healing experience. How do you want to use this as a way to heal further? How can you get the most out of this?
Keep on using the positive distractions as rewards and as self soothing (self care).
I have to say Red, and I hope this doesn't sound patronizing but I am so proud to see how far you have come. It really puts a smile on my face to read your posts lately. Even your language seems to have changed since you first came here. I hope you are present to this. Amazing
Thank you for your considerate, compassionate and caring response.This is a rare quality now a days. It really does mean a lot to me. Especially since I had to go to and deal with Veterans affairs today. You are such a dear friend. Thank you for caring. I should not have to go back there for a long long time now. I am still sad and depressed tonight because of all the memories it brought up to the surface. It was probably good that I was able to let the tears flow today I have been holding them in for so many years now...I know it is going to take some time to heal again but I am hoping to be in better spirits tomorrow..
Red: Oh my that is hot, hot, hot! I wouldn't be able to work outside in that heat either. Glad the fence is adding to your sense of security and peace. I hope you got the Veterans Affairs visit all sorted out and don't have to go back. Good for you for doing it quickly and effeciently.
Yesterday we got half of our fence completed and are loving the privacy..What a relief..
Today the temperature was 102 so we couldn't work on it..
Today I had business to take care of at the Veterans Administration. It was really hard to get though emotionally with lots of
tears but I got through it and am back at home in one piece..
I decided to make some chili when I go home as a positive distraction and a reward of sorts I suppose. I am looking forward to a relaxing and quite evening at home....
Tomorrow we will be working on our project again weather permitting.
Good and it will be if you keep thinking positive. Of course sometimes due to circumstances out of our control the negative sneaks in. So don't forget perception. Even a bad day can end good if you find something good in it.
Lecture over, have a good time, and I want to hear about it when you get time. The good, the bad, and the ugly too.
Heading out of town for our youngest daughter's wedding this weekend. There will be plenty of opportunity to use my new CBT skills from start to finish. Planning on it going well!
