One thing that has really become apparent to me in recent weeks is how much being around a safe person influences my anxiety. I know it's not unusual to feel comforted by having a safe person with you, but the difference between the obstacles I'm willing to tackle with or without someone else with me is really amazing to me now that I've realized it. For instance, I am much more willing to face things like traveling far away from home with a safe person (like our upcoming train trip across the country for the holidays), whereas it is difficult for me to go 15 miles away from home by myself! With a safe person I will go on a boat, go to a sporting event, or travel to another state with fairly low anxiety, but by myself or with people who aren't "safe" it is hard to go to a restaurant, drive to another town, or take the ferry.
I guess I'm trying to wrap my head around what this means about my anxiety. I think I need/want to keep pushing myself on both fronts, so I'm taking on bigger challenges with a safe person but also doing more exposure about doing things by myself. It's not often that I need to travel far away from home without a safe person with me, but that doesn't mean I don't want to be able to do it.
I'm also trying to figure out what it really is about a safe person that helps, because maybe I can learn some helpful self-talk if I know why a safe person diminishes my anxiety. I mean, logically, I see that they aren't really doing anything that makes me less anxious. Here's what comes up for me when I think about being with a safe person:
* I don't feel alone
* I feel like if something bad happens they will help me take care of it
* I don't have to hide my anxiety from them
I would love to hear anyone else's thoughts about all of this.
