Good Morning everyone: Today when I awoke, I saw the sun just starting its golden glow over the cedar hedge in the backyard. Looking at it I felt a real peacefulness. It was just a split second, but I remembered that feeling. I wondered how long has it been since I last felt that. I'm hanging on to that lovely second, a promise of better things to come.
This is all true, but you will get to the point that you can do it without conscious thought. You may not think so now but it will happen. The more positive exposures you have the farther the negative gets buried. It may not seem like it because you are actually progressing rather fast.
Thank you for your support. In answer to your question about how I was able to enable myself to accomplish the things I have? The one thing in the program that has helped me the most is using the 10 question list to challenge every anxious and negative thought that I have as they arise. This is something that I have to stay on top of and do on a regular basis in order to continue to make progress. Like my quilting class for instance. I had to challenge my anxious and negative thoughts in order to have the courage to make it to class again today. I am sure that with every exposure to the class that it will get easier over time and that eventually I will have no anxiety or fear related to going to class. I really do enjoy the class and I think I will be able to concentrate and focus much better in class once the anxiety is gone for good. I find with exposure of any kind that I have to repeat the exposure many times before I am really comfortable with it. If I want to get better I have to really work at it and I really want to get better. I want a better life. In answer to your second question posting here on the site and interacting with every one in the group and with the educators like yourself has really given me insite about myself and people in general. Now in answer to your last question about how I will use my accomplishments to help me in the future. I think every accomplishment makes me stronger as does every exposure. CBT will always need to be a part of my life. It is a new way of thinking, a new way of life and a much better and happier life.
You are a true inspiration to me and many others I am sure. I'm so glad you had a pleasant trip and that your quilting is a safe haven , in a sense.
I too must get back to my real love....my garden, flowers and my paint by numbers. I started doing paint by number last year when my hip was bad. It doesn't sound like much really but it takes alot of time and patience ( which I am trying to improve LOL). I will try an post a picture that I have painted just to show you .
Oh dear, I'm off on another tangent....way to go Red, you are an awesome example of what hard work can accomplish.
I agree with all of these posts, what great news you have brought home to us. I am glad that you were able to enjoy your time and were also able to relax. The purse you bought sounds lovely, as does the lady you bought the purse from. This is another great example of a time where a interpersonal interaction with a stranger is beneficial and this memory will stay with you for many years to come.
Through your recent experiences is it safe to say that you have made some great self-discoveries and have accomplished several great things? How did you enable yourself to do this? How will you use this accomplishments in the future?
My list of three things I have accomplished or am happy about.
1. I am learning that it is ok to put myself first and that when I do I really feel good about myself.
2. I have also learned that I do not have to be a people pleaser all the time.
3. I also feel good about making sure I got home for my quilting class because the class is important to me.
I was able to express my needs and desires, that I would like to go to the engine and tractor show with my partner but that I did need to get home for my class. That I would need to be able to relax at the show and was not going to be there to entertain everyone. I also would need some time to myself to do what I wanted to do. I put myself first because I do matter and I had a good time. I am liking and loving myself and feeling good about the new me.
Sunny, Thanks for the congrats. I wish you could been there to see them also. I am very inspired by what I saw. I haven't come up with any ideas yet. I plan on going to a quilt, craft and sewing festival sewing here locally in late May, maybe I will come up with some ideas then. I do look forward to going. I too like working with my hand and creating things. How is your work with your clay going?
Red
Davit, Thanks for the congrats and I am watching for the fatigue and rebound. Thats why I came home a day early because of the fatigue. I think going to my quilting class tomorrow will help with the rebound. I am sorry to here you are feeling depressed about not been able to do everything you used to do. You are really doing a lot, getting your greenhouse ready and working in the heat. Remember the heat will tire you out when working in greenhouse, so you have really made very good progress in spite of the heat and your disabilities. I am very proud of you Davit. I look forward to seeing your beautiful fruits and vegetables. Tending to them and naturing them is a lot of work. Watching them sprout and grow is a beautiful site indeed. I have not planted anything yet this year but who knows. I usually plant tomatoes.
