Hi Adam!
What gave me a clue to my negative/anxious thoughts was my mood or emotion. If I was feeling angry, sad or depressed, I knew it was because I had a negative or anxious thought. So, when I felt bad, I would ask myself, "Why am I feeling angry, sad or depressed?" And, that's how I discovered what my negative/anxious thoughts were. I would write them down on paper and counteract them with positive truthful statements. Initially, I was only able to discover one or two thoughts this way. But, eventually the flood gates opened and I was aware of many, many more. Try not to get discouraged or overwhelmed when that happens. The key to success is to realize that even if you have one thousand negative thoughts to counteract, be willing to do it again for the one thousand and one time. Over time, you will be able to do this in your head. You are retraining your brain to look for the positive not focus on the negative. After time, it will become automatic and your thoughts will default to finding the positive side of any situation. I know this to be true, because I am at that point now. I know when I'm having a bad day, and since I'm not perfect, I may think negatively or even wallow in it, but it doesn't matter that you do, it matters how long you stay in that negative mind set. So, if I want to fee sorry for myself, I do, but I don't dwell there for long, I find the positive and move forward. Remember that it's taken years to look for the negative. The world has ingrained it in us, just watch the news or read the newspaper. I don't really do that often anymore, so I can remain happy :) I remember looking in the newspaper one time and I was focusing on finding that one positive story and I found it! So, I tuned out all of the other negative stories and focused on the one good story. I know you can do this and it will get easier. I hope this helped. Oh! you will also find that after practicing this, for however long it takes, that you will see that the positive will affect every aspect of your life, just as the negative used to, so that's the good news. It can happen, I'm living proof.
Shari