I came close to caving this evening, BUT I didn't as I mentionned earlier - I bought some patches..so now I think that I will keep them on for a bit, and see how I make out.
I nearly went to the store in my PJ's .. I am sure they would have looked at me like I have 2 heads. I can't believe that 4 days are almost up..and tomorrow will be day 5 and seriously have only had 2 major cravings, and one that found me dang near out the door.
I know that I can fight this today, and for the rest of the night ...well cause I am going to bed, and tomorrow will be the start of Day 5.
I am scared.. I am approaching those days that I break my quit... I think...NO I know that if I pass the 10 day mark, I am well into my quit, but I soo don't want to fail... I am getting emotional thinking about failing myself.. I dont' want to do it.
And you know I haven't lost any sense of control 'yet'came quite close earlier today ..and this evening..but stepped back...this evening I actually went into the garage, and looked for my smokes, until I realized that there was none there. I scolded myself because I know better, and I know that even one puff won't help me get through it. I know that I have to be strong and fight back.
It doesn't help now that I have a cold and and headache and a sore chest.... I don't like this.
I haven't pigged out too much yet ... but hey tomorrow is another day ..oh wait .. I get weighed in tomorrow...see I started my diet back in November and one of my goals that I set for myself was that once I hit the 20lb mark of lost weight... I would quit smoking....so I know that I have it in me to lose the weight..I know I have it to quit smoking..
and think this..when Nicodemon has faded away .. I will GAIN my life.. and likely a few pounds...but my life is more important that a false friend like Nicodemon.
My Friends thank you for your support today .. I am off to bed to make me better... all around.
Have a smokeless today and all the tomorrow will be brighter cause you will be able to see the light .. there will be no fog !!!!
Hugs
Jan
PS Some of you may remember me from last yr... I had a good quit going but then I lost many family members due to illness and accidents in a short period of time - see Josie and John W I told
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Quit Meter
$25,693.50
Amount Saved
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Quit Meter
Days: 699
Hours: 11
Minutes: 26
Seconds: 49
Life Gained
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Quit Meter
4894
Smoke Free Days
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Quit Meter
73,410
Cigarettes Not Smoked
