hey there Brenda, i am so sorry to hear the way you feel,,been there done that. you should try asking your doctor for mild tranquilizers. it really help at that moment, and it will help you sleep.i notice when i get those feelings bad like that, that i am sometimes scared to goto sleep, its always in my mind (is this going to be another horrible night), it makes evey night worse that follows, then you cant sleep. so try asking him for something, not enough sleep REALLY brings on the attacks.

Hey.. you said that you got zero sleep before going to work.. at least you have a job. I keep getting fired all of the time. :(

Hi Brenda, I read your post here. Phew! I feel so bad for you honey. I know what you are going thru, but I can't imagine having to feel so alone going thru it. I guess i'd say that it sounds to me like your husband is not being exactly "understanding" of this. Ok, so he doesn't know what's happening to you or what to do about it, but he still needs to hold you and comfort you and stand by your side as you attempt to figure this out. Why isn't that happening? :quest: You sound to me like you are very intuitive. You know yourself pretty well and you are already suspicious of the "treatment" you are getting from the doctor. I think this may for good reason. I have said in another post that I believe hormone levels could have a large play in all of this. I don't think it's everyone's problem of course. I just think that in many cases there is a strong correlation between women with panic disorders and women who have either just had a baby recently, are on their menstrual cycles when they have attacks or are going thru menopause. Check it out. There are a lot of biological factors that could be causing these things. Brenda, the next time you feel one coming try to slowly deep breathe and "control" it some. See if you can fight one off. Then you know if you can fight even one down, you can fight them all. See what happens. I find lying flat on the floor helps me, walking outside in the fresh air and breathing slowly while rubbing my heart slowly as if to say "it's ok ...let's just calm down". Tell your mind that you refuse to go full throttle with this...see if you can jewel it down in a sense. Get what I mean? Be careful of Xanax. It is the most addictive Benzodiazepine on the market. I mean the withdrawl effects of the drug are actually the same if not worse in most cases than the anxiety symptoms that had you getting on it in the first place. This may be why your Dr. wants you to try other things. I know you feel like you need it because...AHHHHHHHH! That's why. But try to see if you can work with something else and use it sparingly when you need it the most. The power is in you Brenda to stop this...you already know that. Take care of you, Andrea This message was edited by am on 3-27-03 @ 2:17 PM

Hi Brendacap, You did the right thing by posting. Letting out the fustrations help. Having it bottle up just gets our panic loving us more. Which is not good. I should know. I am the queen of holding it. I am proud of you that you called your brother so, you could calm down. You did it!!!! Talk to your doctor again and tell him what has been happening. You know your body more then the doctor does. He needs to know what is going on. Way to go Brendacap!!! :) Foa

It's been a week or so since I last posted on here...I actually got 5 hours of sleep 3 nights ago although I did wake up with my heart racing after 3 hours of sleep and was awake for an hour and then fell asleep for another 2 hours....it felt so wonderful to get those precious FIVE hours of rest. But yesterday I could tell that I was going to have difficulty sleeping last night and I went to work today with ZERO amount of sleep. At 3:45 this morning I guess I had the worst panic attack of my life although I thought I had some major ones in the past. This morning my heart was beating so HARD and FAST that I thought I surely must be dieing. It sounds insane I know but it felt like my heart was bouncing around inside a hollow box in my chest. It seemed to go on for about 10 minutes but was probably less....it has left me with shakiness and rapid pulse all day and too tense to even try to lie down tonight. I ran screaming for my husband to get up and help me and after much non verbal attitude of "I wish she would let me sleep"..he finally came in to see if I was ok. By that time I was pacing the floor crying and trying to call my brother although my hands were shaking so bad I had to try his number several times before I pushed the right numbers. Talking to my brother did help to calm me down but I have been in a bad state all day and tonight. My husband and daughter are asleep and I can only imagine what comfort sweet sleep would bring. Tomorrow I go to the doctor but he will pat me on my leg and tell me that my worrying is worst than my physical illness. Somehow he has not convinced me of that yet.....taking me off my Xanax and putting me on Serax didn't seem to help one bit either but he is a firm believer in NOT using Xanax....it was the only medication that kept me calm enough to live my life without the terror I seem to carry with me day and night now......I'm growing so weary.....thanks for listening...I just needed to let some of this pain go tonight......