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for 9 år siden 0 11226 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi in1peace,
 
I am sorry to read this. I can really hear in what you write that this is causing you a lot of distress. I don't have any advice either but I do have some questions I want you to think about...

It seems that when you get anxious and beg a friend this is what pushes them away? What thoughts make you beg them? Can these thoughts be challenged?
It seems you know the better approach - sorting out the misunderstanding - what prevents you from doing this? Can this be challenged?
In your most recent situation, what would you have done differently?
If it happens again, what can you do differently to prevent what has happened previously?
 
 

Ashley, Health Educator
for 9 år siden 0 111 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Most welcome. I think it was brave of you to share with us.
for 9 år siden 0 58 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thank you SimplyCatherine. Just someone acknowledging this helps. It's a weird thing to confess on a forum, because then you risk other people not sure if they want to try to befriend you. 
for 9 år siden 0 111 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I really don'T have any wisdom or advice to give. But I did want to say I heard your pain and empathize with you. I am sure other members will come along with support and insight.
for 9 år siden 0 58 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I have this issue when making friends. I usually end up screwing things up with the very people I admire the most. I tend to anticipate the moment I'll do the wrong thing to cause a friend to reject me. I don't understand how it happens, but usually, in every case, there is a misunderstandineg either on my part or their part. Andd instead of working on untangling the misunderstanding, I get so anxious that I actually make things worse, pushing people farther away. I tend to beg the friend for the friendship, rather than focus on fixing the issue that caused the misunderstanding. I almost feel like I don't know how to be a good friend. Like I never properly learned. I don't want this to keep happening!! Maybe it's because I feel like I don't bring value to a friendship. I don't know. I still have not discovered my core belief that causes this issue. It causes great pain and intense because I love people and need them in my life. Sorry...I'm long winded here. But does anyone else have this very same problem? I feel stuck with this issue and I've been stuck on it for a very, very long time. 

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