tanya
its smart of you to do some research concerning your problems and writing to this site. I hope you can get some helpful advice. i agree with you that you should be somewhat cautious in talking to someone about ending your life...that sort of stuff sets off all sorts of alarm bells in people's minds...on the other hand you have to recognize when you are in a real emergency situation and seriously need immediate help. i hasten to add i don't know too mush on the subject. Thoughts of dying and suicide enter my mind, but not in a serious way. I just think "o that it would be so easy if i died, no more stress", but on the other hand i have a great curiousity about what life will serve me up next and about what will happen in the world. so if a therapist asks me if i have suicidal thoughts i just say no, because i don't think i would ever do it.
on the question of getting out of depression, i think you have to go beyond medication and therapy and take some initiatives of your own, as you are doing by writing into this site. perhaps you can experiment with various activities and groups, but perhaps your therapist has already covered that sort of stuff.
you sound fortunate in that you work and that you have empathetic coworkers.
in general i am certain lots of strange thoughts circulate though the average person's head whether they are depressed or not. a thought or a fantasy is only risky if we mistake it for reality, that's my thinking.
did you ever suffer a significant traumatic event in your life that you have to deal with?
I am interested in this thread so I can learn more about your topic. I hope you write some more. And I wish you well
In closing i'd like to add a disclaimer in saying that I am merely writing from personal experience and with a superficial education, so you shouldn't take my posting too seriously. i say that because the subject of suicide often merits professional consideration.
bob
