Brianszgirl, Being over medicated is certainly a big concern for all of us. We know our own bodies the best and have to be assertive when dealing with the people that provide meds for us. Also be sure to use the love, compassion, understanding, and support of your husband. Sometimes we don't see the "big picture" because we are right in the middle of the storm. I know my husband is always with me when I talk to a dr. about medications. He can sometimes have a more objective vision of the meds and the changes they make in me. We don't want to feel the panic, anxiety, and/or depression we are feeling right now, but we also don't want to be zombies and not feel ANYTHING. I hope your appointment goes well. Keep the faith, and don't forget to let me know how things go at the appointment. Kelly

Hi Kelley, Thanks for replying and sharing your info. I have seen psychiatric's, but no luck yet. I have an appointment with one who I've seen before (10+ years ago) next week, but she over medicated me as well back then. I'm scared that's what will happen again, Every time I see one, that's what they do. I just want to be normal again. Where I live, there's not a lot of choice in that department. I always feel so uncomfortable, like they are judging me, and don't really want to help me, but shut me up. It helps to know I am not alone!!

Hi Brianszgirl, Welcome to the site. Thanks for sharing your introduction here with us. You have found a great place to share your feelings of depression with members who truly understand what it is like to experience depression. Please be sure to check out the free cbt online program offered here. Each session in the Depression Program is based on previous sessions, and if you track your mood with your Mood Tracker (and keep notes in the spaces provided) you'll see much improvement over the coming weeks. At the beginning of each session we give you a Weekly Review, which allows you to see how far you've progressed. We save your Weekly Review results in your Session Diary, so you will see a collection of results, which are all based on what you write in your worksheets. CBT is a lot of work but the good news is that if you follow the program it will all come together for you as you start to feel better. Please don't hesitate to contact us if you have any other questions or concerns. Casey ___________________________________ The Depression Center Support Team

Brianszgirl, Do you see a psychologist at all? I know it is difficult to find one sometimes that you trust, but I know I couldn't go without seeing mine. I go once every six weeks and it just helps me to talk things over with him. He is a wonderful psychologist and is very concerned about his patients. As far as the meds go, it is hard to say what works for one person or another. I have been on Paxil, then off, then on again, then off, then Wellbutrin then added Zoloft and take Zanax when necessary. This seems to be a good combination for me, but that may not work for someone else. As for going back and forth with the depression episodes, I can truly relate! I get so frustrated sometimes I could scream! I am in the process of going through a time like that right now. I do everything I am supposed to do. I take my meds every day, I go see my psychologist, I sit in front of a sunlight simulation lamp, I journal, I pray, I do devotions and still this awful disease creeps up and bites me in the butt! I know this is not helpful as far as giving you answers, but it helps me to know I am not alone in my suffering. Others understand and know where you are coming from. Please know that we have all been at least someplace close to where you are right now, and are here to listen whenever you need us. Kelly

What is with this hold depression and anxiety has on us? Once I think I'm home free, it creeps up again. I would like to explain my situation and would love to hear from ANYBODY who can help me...10 years ago I had a spell with depression, tried to commit sucide (not really wanting to kill myself, I just wanted the attention.) I won't go into those details, just this episode's time. I am 33 years old, I had a very high stressful job, worked for a real a**hole, and when a top dog left (because of the work environment, who had been there 22 years), everything was thrown my way. I had to do his job to do my job. Then I had to train the new person, etc. I got really sick, I lost 30 lbs, had dark circles under my eyes, couldn't focus, sleep, concentrate or anything else. I had crying spells and lashing out at people spells. I was so fatiqued, I just knew I had cancer of M.S. (my mom had M.S. and passed in 2000) so I went to my medical doctor and was shocked when he said I had the classic case of "severe depression", even though I had been thru it before. He started me out on Cymbalta 30 mgs, went up to 60, 1 month later added Remeron 30 mg, 1 month later added Wellbutrin 300 mg and 1 month later added Depakote ER 500mg. I was basically a walking zombie. I decided if I was going to take this much medicine, I better see a pdoc and make sure I was taking the right medicine. Well, I went to see the pdoc and I was right, I was on too many high doses of antidepressants. He starts taking me off and the roller coster begins once again. He gave me prozac, then stopped it because it wasn't working and started Effexor XR and over time he added klonopin & lithium. Everybody said I wasn't like myself, so my dad told me to see his medical doctor, he had agreed to see me. He said I was on too much medicine so AGAIN I taper off. He said he didn't like to prescribe benzo's, (I did try to stop) but since I was having withdrawals, so he gave me Xanax XR 1 mg to add to Effexor XR. Things seem to be going well, I also had a problem with constipation for 1+ years and fiber & laxatives weren't working anymore, so he added Zelnorm 6 mg 2 x day. I prayed to God to get me thru this time in my life, and one day at work my boss jumped me for something that I was not involved in, and I quie