BFS - thanks for bumping this post. I can really relate to everything you said. Imagine that your 1 day slip snowballed like mine did into almost a year - after a 2-1/2 year quit (over 900 days) I blew it too - but for a much longer time. Had I not messed up, I would be at around 1,300 days right now, instead of just 70-something! Blech!
You really hit the nail on the head in describing how quitting after a relapse seems even harder than the initial quit. I know the pain, guilt and extreme shame all too well. I honestly felt that making the decision to stop the 2nd time was considerably harder than the 1st - I guess because I knew it had to be for the LAST time.
Reality hit when I found this site, 1 day after I quit - when I saw the acronym N.O.P.E - I felt so depressed, and angry, and frustrated. I knew it was true - for real! A rude awakening, but oh, so necessary.
I know in my guts I don't have yet another quit left in me - so this one HAS to stick!
Thanks again for your post, and for bumping it for the benefit of newer members.
sushik
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/31/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 78
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,970
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $702
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 7 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 3 [B]Seconds:[/B] 12
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