I've been reading all kind of posts all day today. About emotions, negative or positive,attitudes, struggles to avoid Nico, struggles to get over withdrawal syptoms and all posts that i "see" myself in,posts that will help me in the future to avoid similar situations.
I can write and write,wanting to thank all you guys who are here, who answer,support,give advice or just a nice word of comfort.
So,i post this little text.......... It's not the story of my life..it's the sadness that makes me write this. It's the sadness of personal problems... but i'm starting to get more angry ,sad, disappointed with myself because i see that i'm turning into a "bad:" person. I'm sad.. and i'm always nervous.. and i'm always ready to fight with everybody..for nothing.I push myself to do things even though i would like to stay under the bed and do nothing. I move around because Nico is chasing me,reminding me the days that i was sad and i was just sitting on the sofa smoking..thinking that another puff would make me feel better. I know,no puff ever made me feel better..solved my problems etc.
I miss the habit...i told you before. I miss this thing between my fingers...i miss...don't know what.
But then i try to see how good i feel (at least my body) breathing better,smelling better.. etc etc...
Is the lack of nicotine make me more angry? i know i have my problems. I know my personal life is not helping my effort to quit smoking... but could i be more angry because of it?
I went to do some blood test today-for my thyroid- i had an operation when i was 16 and i control it often. I know if my thyroid is not well balanced, it can cause me lots of ups and downs in my mood.
Don't know if i would like that this is the problem..or the lack of nicotine..or just my problems...
i'm glad i'm 20days free...i'm fighting with it a lot though........
(please forgive my english)
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 8/23/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 20
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 202
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] �60
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 29 [B]Seconds:[/B] 46