Breathless,
Scary as it is, the only way to make an 'unsafe' place into a 'safe' place is to go there. Positive visualisations and relaxation techniques can help and are a good first step, but if you never actually go there in the flesh you're still restricted. But you don't have to go there every day... that would just overload you. You have to pace yourself at a rate that you can handle. It's like if you decide to run a marathon - you don't suddenly get out of bed and go and run 50 miles on the first day. If you did you'd probably kill yourself! You start a training regime and gradually work up to it, and you have to give yourself rest days in the middle.
I am on benefits and I have to deal with the social security department frequently (Ugh) and it's one of the things that really scared me witless. I had to work up to it gradually. The first time I tried to persuade myself to go and apply I had a screaming panic attack just thinking about the WORD 'Centrelink'... so I abandoned proceedings, but the idea of doing it sat in my mind and simmered. I thought about going there lots of times and each time it scared me a little less... I pictured myself doing it and being calm and having an easy time and walking out HAPPY... and then eventually I picked up the phone and called them, and even though I was too scared to talk to them myself (I had to get my mother to do it for me) I was able to make the call. And then I went to the building with my mother and it wasn't as bad as I'd feared... six months later I'm able to go there by myself and my greatest feeling is annoyance at having to stand in their queues! It's become part of my routine, and not such a terrifying prospect. But if I'd never made the first move, I'd still be cowering in my bedroom without any income. This wasn't a fast proceeding - it probably took twelve months in total, because the first time I tried to do it I couldn't get further than the initial thought and then I had to leave it alone for three months.
