I know I put this up earlier, but I might not get to write another for a while. So I hope nobody minds.
Goodbye my friend.....
You were in my life longer than anyone, for more than 22 years, all day every day you were by my side. Towards the end i would panic if you werent around i felt lost without you.
When we started out we had such a laugh, it was a casual relationship, and we had such fun. Who would have thought our relationship would turn out as serious as it did?
You certainly were there for me my friend, through the good and the bad. Whenever i had something to celebrate you were there with me my friend. Whenever i was upset, you held my hand.I was never alone. Its crazy, remember when I had my baby, i lied to the nurse, pretended I wanted to use the loo, so that i could escape and spend time with you.
You became so important to me. You were more important than anything or anyone, although I probably wouldnt have admitted that at the time. You always came first, nothing could come between us. I thought i enjoyed your company. But the price for your friendhship was high. You made me believe that i could not live without you. You made me so dependent on you, normal functions were not normal if you were not around. Things went downhill when the price i paid for your friendship grew higher. You were in my space so much, I could no longer breath, you were suffocating me. I was paying �52.50 a week for the pleasure of your company, you must have been laughing!
The stress of my relationship with you was beginning to get etched on my face. The tar had destroyed my teeth. Its funny how i never noticed that until it was too late. I was scared to leave you behind. When I had treatment for cervical cancer i was told that my relationship with you had made it worse, and could even have been a primary cause. I vowed then to leave you behind. I hated you for what you had done to me.
I tried to shake you off. I ran and ran but you would always find a way back into my life. Even when I got away from you, when things got bad, I would tell myself that you were all that i deserved and let you back in.
I so wanted to escape from you, but doing that forever seemed imposssible.
Then one day by chance, I posted a message to a message board f