Gr8 question! Naaaaa it doesn't have any negative effects on my personal quit, only positive. Hearing that someone relapsed is very sad, especially when you know how hard they worked to get where they were. But they didn't "throw it all away" b/c they did have that time smoke-free and are healthier for it. And we can pray for that person :) Life's a journey and it's about progress, not perfection. Everyone makes mistakes. I think a person shows their maturity level by the way they re-act. I'm not using the word, maturity, in a mean or sarcastic way. I think maybe fear is a better word. I've noticed when someone relapses and has the COURAGE to post about it that the majority of posts are to one extreme or the other. Either they're loving & caring & lend a helping hand, OR they're judgemental & critical. I don't think the judgemental, critical posts realize that they're re-acting out of fear. But I know that those posts do not help the person that had enough courage to come in and post. The reason a person comes in here is b/c they want help. So if we aren't able to post a helpful message, then we shouldn't post at all. And if it bothers us to read about someone relapsing, we definitely don't have to go into that thread to begin with. We have choices and in a place of "support" such as SSC if we choose to post something that is the opposite of helpful, the mods delete it b/c that's not what support is about. No, it doesn't bother me that people come in here and post that they've relapsed, that's life. They're are days when you can tell that someone is full of hope and days when someone is full of dispair or "on their pitty pot". The worst thing we can do make fun of, or kick someone when they are down. It's not a good feeling. And if we don't truly care for ourself and love ourself then we can't truly love someone else. Anger, bitterness, negativity = fear :( Kindness, hope & love = faith :) You all know me, I could go on & on & I do, lol. I'm not only sharing my thoughts and what I've learned to help you all, I'm also trying to help myself, to, strengthen my desire & comittment to this quit. I really want to be smoke-free again! And I will type till my fingers fall off if that's what it takes, lol. It's not easy to give up smoking & a boyfriend at the same time. I could easily tell myself that I should wait and quit smoking after I get over the boyfriend BUT I don't want to do that. I really hate smoking and that's why I'm typing my little heart out. We are all only human, we are weak in many areas & strong in others & there's not one person in this world that is better than you or better than me. GOD is in charge and is the one and only one who will judge us. In the meantime if we let go of our fears and let GOD be in control and stop trying to control things that we have no control over, it will be much easier to remain smoke-free. If only I could learn to do this with more consistancy, sighhhhhh. It's not easy but it's can be done. Maybe not 100% of the time but that just goes to show how imperfect each and everyone of us is. The above can be especially hard for us addcits b/c one common trait we share is wanting to be perfect. All this stems from wanting approval and never getting it as a child. I'm not saying this is 100% accurrate for everyone but it's the only one I've experienced and can intelligently share about. Perfectionism is a set-up for failure. Like someone in here said, if you play with fire you will get burned. The reason many of us play with fire is b/c we want to hurt ourselves because that's where we feel best in our "comfort zone". But as we "progress" through this journey called life and learn to love ourselves we will grow further away from that fire :) So again, no it doesn't bother me to read a post from someone who has relapsed or is on their pity pot. Because I'm not perfect either. I cry when I'm sad and laugh when I'm happy just like everyone. Of course they're are ways to be happy more often, we just have to learn them. For example, the thread in here about changing the way we think and living a more positive life. But even then I honestly do not believe that anyone is happy & positive 100% of the time. So nope, it doesn't bother me :) & yes I definitely find your threads to be very helpful in my quit. Us addicts are very intelligent people!!!!! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Over 1/2 of day 4 gone and still smoke-free!!!!!! Just breathe......ahhhhhhhhhh Just breathe......ahhhhhhhhhh [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/16/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 3 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 60 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $14.40 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 8 [B]Mins:[/B] 36 [B]Seconds:[/B] 10

When a long timer loses a quit, it affects me alot. I am saddened by it and also fearful for my own quit. I agree with Aloha, don't tell us the gorey details, we don't want, nor need to hear that! Tell us what to do to prevent it from happening to us! I am a true believer that in giving help to others it helps you in your own quit, alot more people on this sight should learn about that! Thanks Stickin! :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/5/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 167 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 4,175 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,761.85 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 20 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 57 [B]Seconds:[/B] 40

I had a long term quit and than forgot N.O.P.E I did not return here until I knew I was ready to be smoke free forever Reason: it really bothered me before when peple would lose their quit and go on and on about it. You have to take responsibility for your own actions and I did. 2nd question, and the answer is C most deafinitly. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/8/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 11 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 143 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $55.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 21 [B]Seconds:[/B] 43

I assume you want an honest answer. yes... It effects me deeply!! I can't describe it other than it is like an ill person not realizing how sick they are.... hearing the death sentence...."I'm sorry..there's no hope." Yet....You hang on tight anyway repeating like a broken record... "it won't be me...it won't be me...it won't be me..." Mercy [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/21/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 210 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 4,200 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $938.70 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 27 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 59 [B]Seconds:[/B] 19

Hi Sue and JDK, Not this ex JDK and I know of a flock of others. You will see what I am talking about just keep the quit on track and don't smoke. The thoughts vanish and so to the desire. One day at a time now and you will have that answer! Thank you both for your posts here. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/22/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 574 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 10,332 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,157.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 104 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 30 [B]Seconds:[/B] 54

Stickin' - yes it scares me, we are all human and subject to fall, but this is my quit, it belongs to me and I am the only person that can take it away from myself. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/3/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 108 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,080 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $189.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 10 [B]Hrs:[/B] 7 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 16

Stickin, Yes, it makes me realise how easy it is to go back to smoking even after many hundreds of days quit. It reminds me to keep my guard up and not smoke. I think within every ex-smoker there is a desire for a smoke, you have to remind yourself why you quit. Speaking to someone who quit for 9 years about smoking brought that home to me. The way she romanticised after each smoke. And that is 9 years smoke free! p.s. apologies for not answering properly the first time around. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 38 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 950 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �159.60 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 4 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 22 [B]Seconds:[/B] 34

Thank you for your kindness, however the important questions is: When a longer term quitter stumbles or fails does that affect your personal detemination to remain smoke free? If yes how and if no why? [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/22/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 574 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 10,332 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,157.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 104 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 23 [B]Seconds:[/B] 10

Hi Stickin, 'C' for me too. I look forward to each post from you and all the other oldies. Theres so much wisdom to impart to the newbies. ALways great posts. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 38 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 950 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �159.60 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 4 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 20 [B]Seconds:[/B] 28

Lots of varied responses here. Keep it coming! Stickin, As you can see your posts are very helpful to many and your hard work is very much appreciated! Danielle, Bilingual Support Specialist