You are a very strong person. You are dealing with a personal tragedy that would send anyone reeling but you are working your way through it. You are still caring for your children and helping them deal with their grief and are seeking help from your Dr. You are moving in the right direction and now your talking to us about it. Very positive steps. Keep posting as you will find encouragement and support here.
Rose
Hi, Essie. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Don't worry. Because you've been dealing with panic, you are one step ahead of those who have to deal with a loss without having dealt with the kind of pain and fear you go through with PD. I hope that made sense. I guess what I'm trying to say is that having a panic disorder makes you stronger, in a way, because it constantly causes you to deal with fear and dread. I'm telling you this so you know you have it in you to get through this. You are stronger than you think you are! Don't worry about dependency on your meds right now. Listen to your doctor. You may need the extra boost to keep going and there's no shame in that. I'm here to listen and help any way I can. I'll be thinking about you.
Katie
I'm having a huge setback now.
I've had a panic disorder since the birth of my second child 18 years ago. It been under control off and on with the help of meds and therapy. I've had horrible panic attacks in the bathroom and have a terrible "shy bowel" and a paranoia about being "watched".
Needless to say, I've done okay, but 8 months ago my oldest son died suddenly. My world was thrown to pieces and my panic attacks have come back full swing. Paranoia plagues me. The meds I've used before (very small dose) aren't working now and the Dr. says to increase the med (Xanax) I'm scared to for fear of dependancy, but I have to do something.
I've had some grief counseling, but it doesn't deal with the PA's and phobia's.
I'm just so overwhelmed and so scared that I'll get myself back into a horrible cycle again. I have 4 younger children to take care off and to help with their grief.
Maybe I just need some encourage and someone to tell me that I will get this under control.....that this is just a "transition" or something. I'm not new to this, so I don't know why I'm freaking out so much.
