Hey everyone. I just wanted to vent and tell about what happened to me when I took these "antidepressants". If you are reading this, I'm not trying to scare anyone, everyones bodies are different...
Well I was just plain old depressed. I was 16, high school...you know, I just wanted to die. And I tryed, a lot. No success as you can tell. Anyway I got so depressed my stomach starting hurting all the time. I was so scared to go out into public because fear of my stomach hurting and there being no one to help me. (Thats when I got my first panic attacks)
The doctors put me on nexium, then prevacid (didn't seems to work, PROBABLY BECAUSE I WAS DEPRESSED IT WAS ACID REFLUX) Finally they figured it out! Woohoo! Its crazy these people actually went to medical school.
Zoloft. 1st week, nausea. I was so sick to my stomach I could hardly leave my bed.
Okay! Lets get off that and try Effexor. At first nothing happened. About 3-4 weeks into it, I could feel it. Everything was so pretty. Like taking a fat extacy pill. I felt good. I was skinny and pretty, had friends everything was great. I stayed on Effexor (37.5mg) daily for 2 years. Then one day I just suddenly had a panic attack. Then it got so much worse. Everyday for 2 weeks I was having one panic attack after another. I couldn't be weaned off effexor because when I tryed taking the 12.5 mg it just got worse and worse. I ended up having to go to Tuckers (Tuckers=mental hospital) for suicide attempts. I just wanted to feel normal again and be happy. The only way I thought I would feel happy was in death.
In Tuckers they got me off Effexor copmpletely and started me on 25mg Paxil CR.
I'm now 19, almost 1 1/2 years on Paxil. Things were great. I remember saying "Paxil should be in the drinking water" I felt normal. Then I went from 105 lbs to 180lbs within a 6 month period. Now, today, I still am taking my paxil but I'm not feeling so great. I'm constantly getting "pinging" feelings inside of my head. I'm scared. I haven't had a panic attack, but I'm so scared of going to Tuckers again. It seems like I feel down the hole I've emerged from so many times. My life sucks again. I've had it with pills. I'm so sad. Any advice? Anyone out there? Does anyone care?
[i]CAR