I wasn't going to post, I was just going to get through it, but this crave keeps persisting and gnawing at my mind. I can't even figure out what has brought it on, or for how long its been going on. I'm trying to think back, but my memory isn't all that great. Maybe 2 weeks now, I know it's been a while, but I keep pushing back the thoughts. Its just really frustrating to be almost 400 days in and have to feel some of the same things you felt at day 30. It makes you question whether it's all worth it, even though we all know it is worth it. I can't find the trigger, bills are paid, jobs are stable, wait, maybe it's the new job my wife started 3 weeks ago. She is on swing shift, and we're experiencing the first cycle of it right now. The 1st week she was on days Monday -Friday, the 2nd week she was on 2nd shift Monday-Friday, and this, the third week, she is on 3rd shift, 8 hours nights Monday - Friday and 12 hour nights Saturday and Sunday, then she is off Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. Her schedule has brought on some serious changes in the house, for one, I have to cook a lot now, and do more laundry, and clean more often....just like the perfect husband that I am...hehe...
Yep, maybe that is it, I think I found my trigger, so all I can do is my part around here and get used to her new schedule, then all should go back to normal. Thanks for hearing me out, sometimes writing it helps, it just helped me find out why I'm feeling that stupid junkie in me cry and moan. I wonder if I tell the lovely wife housework is a trigger I could get out of it?????
My Mileage:My Quit Date: 4/2/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 393
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 15,720
Amount Saved: $4,716.00
Life Gained:Days: 58
Hrs: 16
Mins: 20
Seconds: 38