Me too, I know exactly what you mean-thought I was the only one! Im very comfortable in informal social situations but I feel at work that everyone is better than me and have no confidence there. Im not ugly either, so I know its nothing physical but Im constantly keyed up and as a result I tend to do silly things- drop things etc. I have been passed over for countless promotions due to confidence and Im not working at the moment. So I have decided to sort this out once and for all, start learning to relax and build my confidence up in formal situations. Use the 12 week program and any hypnotherapy materials as suggested. I use the self confidence trainer from uncommon knowledge with performance patterning techiques. chardthefish x

Hi Laurie thanks for your reply, i guess in a,lot of ways, the mind plays tricks on the body, i too wonder if i smile enough. The mind plays tricks and things sometimes arent as bad as they seem when your sensitized. hope you are going well in your job, had a 9 travelling to work yesterday(scale 1-10, with 10 being freaked out..) yet during the day, came down to about a 2 as i relaxed, i do reccoment the hypnotherapy tapes to anyone , they are not a cure all, but they sure do help you relax and sleep. and the subliminal messages, are supposed to do wonders. I read some other forum users spending all theere money on actually going to a hypnotherapist, i find this unessscary, as there are plenty of great CDs for around $20, you can play over and over again, they are great,,,,,,,,,,,,hope you have a great day Laurie Tigger66

:)Hi tigger66, I understand completely what your going through. I also have problems at work. I get anxious that I don't smile enough, or that I don't talk enough and I also have a terrible time around my family as well. I can only conclude that these are the people who will judge me the most. customer or clients only see you briefly and they never really know the person you are. you can also act around them and they would never know the difference. Your job is new and this could be adding stress as you are learning something new causing possible brain drain and maybe a different work schedule so maybe sleeping and eating are off a bit. allow time to adjust and you will find maybe some of the nervous tension you are feeling will go away as you become familiar with your co workers and your new job. good luck. P.s. I have never taken paxil but I have taken celexa 40mg but unfortunately it didn't work out as it effected me by making me very angry all the time, was not good. I know you know that if you don't feel better after awhile there are many other types available switching is hard but if it isn't helping you can't be suffering needlessly. Laurie02

Hi I just joined and wondered of any one has gone thru this kind of fear. My fear is a specific fear, one that has to do with feeling socially anxious with people who seem stronger than me and more happier than me. I just started a new job, and it entails sitting around a table for 20 mins every morning, and again at the end of the day to discuss the days buisness. The rest of the time im out on the road, and with someone still as i am training. I feel so tight and miserable at times in that situation , yet for the last 5 years i was self employed, and do not have a problem meeting customers, going to bars, mall, cinema etc. My self employ did not work out and i had to take this job , and i wanted too, cos the benifits are so good and the prospects are pretty good too . This is such a big handicap in my life and it goes back all the way as far as i can remeber, yet most people who know me would be very surprised i have a social anxiety, as i tend to hide it a lot, but then again with family, i feel comfortable so i do not have it then. Im nervous, very nervous if i have ever have to get photos taken,(horrible,horrible, yet im a pretty good looking guy..:O). so people tell me. I was so confident when i did my old job with different customers every day and travelling freely on my own.I feel like a freak sometimes, as it comes and goes without warning. I recently got diazepan to help relax me when i got home and also got to the doctors who proscribed me paxil for my anxiety. This is another point , is Paxil what it claims to be? I realise different meications have different effects on different people, any success stories out there with this, im am trying to define whether my anxiety is due to psychological factors, or indeed a medical one with serotonin levels going up and down at different times. At this present time i have an excellent hypnotherapy tape which is very relaxing and i am about to start on a three month cognotherapy course which i bougth on the internet off the social anxiety institute website. i feel at time , on a 1-10 scale when i am at 10 and feel totally fearful and paranoid, i just want to jack the job in and go back to being a loner in the self employ business, which i do not really want cos that has different headaches off it