I have been doing some Spring Cleaning, going through drawers etc. In my Craft room I opened a drawer.. and OMG there was an ashtray ( one of those that draw the smoke in) when I relapsed last quit and was trying to closet smoke...
it had 3 butts in it. ( I slammed the drawer) The next day I opened a little end table drawer.. there was a pac with 3 cigarettes in it. I also jumped back and slammed that drawer.
I have ignored them a couple days.. They had been sending out little reminders... you can have one puff.. no one will ever know.. I didn't ven want to get close to the drawers or pick up the pack to drown it or get it in the garbage. The sneakey thoughts would come and go.. Especially if I had finished a tassk, then i wanted to sit and take a break.. ok what was the old habit.. yes chatters in my head... and I did have enough sense to say NO and to understand the reason I lost my Last quit ( which would be over 700 days now.. if I had kept it) was ONE stinkinking puff...
My daughter phoned, said she was on her way over. I grabbed a bag, got the ashtray and grabbed the plastic bag.. tied a knot in the top and got it on the porch.
When she got here I was probably babbling.. and telling her about yelling at the drawer... She said do you want me to get a bag... I said NO .. and pointed to the porch.. OH.. she grabbed the bag and put it in her car..
YEAH they are gone.. and the sneakey snake thoughts went down the drive way also..
This is a Reminder to all.. NOT ONE PUFF... there is no such thing.. if you have closed that door, keep it closed, it is like a Medusa . with all those heads.... put a picture in you head of something yucky in a box.. like a jack in a box, or a forbidden door.. do not open..
Bonnie
My Mileage:My Quit Date: 5/7/2010
Smoke-Free Days: 55
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 935
Amount Saved: $187.00
Life Gained:Days: 7
Hrs: 7
Mins: 5
Seconds: 7
