Oh Vickers I must sound like some weak pathetic wimp, I know you do not feel like that but I do. I want SO much Vickers to feel better, I know I am trying to rush it but I have felt so bad for so long its become unbearable, there are a few times when I feel better and I just wish I could hold on to it. Right now I am very sick, and I know that has made it so much worse, I am coughing so bad my whole body aches, every 10 minutes I have a severe coughing fit and its exhausting it actually makes me dizzy and vomit, I know I cannot take anything for it, I am hoping once this illness passes I can work harder on the road to recovery, I am tired of it Vickers I really am, I want it gone so bad, August has been bad for me with the kidney infection and now this what I think is Bronchtis. I did start the panic program I did not finish it but now I will, I hate living like this Vickers and I am ready to get better, sometimes the "how" elludes me, it seems like the more I try, like one step forward two steps back. I have never been so fed up with this and ready to get better, at least to function on a normal basis. Thank you VIckers for your time, you are very smart and perceptive and have helped me. Thank you, Debbie.

I know you feel like your world is falling apart but you will be ok. Stress is a normal part of life. It is ok to be afraid. It is a natural emotion in times of turmoil. It is ok! The Paxil is not going to take this away for you. Meds only help with the physical symptoms and help ease your body so you don't notice the symptoms as much and in turn, don't panic as much. But, they will not take this away. Why do you think people are constantly changing their meds or upping the dosage? Because even though the physical symptoms are being helped, they do not control your thoughts. Nothing will take this away except you. You have to believe in yourself! Even God says He will help those who help themselves. He has faith in your ability but He also loves you enough to not give you peace because He knows you have to work for it. It is in you and it comes from what you are telling yourself. You need to listen to your inner talk if you want to find the key. For instance, you keep telling yourself that you feel like you are dying. You absolutely believe that there is something physically wrong with you that is killing you. If your mind is telling your body there is something wrong, your body is going to react. You need to change your thought patterns. Write down what you are afraid of. Challenge your thoughts and prove to yourself that what your thoughts are screaming at you are wrong. I'm not sure if you have started the Panic Program on here or not, I can't remember if you ever said you had. So, I'm going to list the 10 questions they suggest when challenging your thoughts. Ask yourself these questions about every thing that you are panicking about at the moment. It doesn't matter if there's one thing or a hundred things. The point is that you challenge the thoughts and prove to yourself there really is nothing to be afraid of. Anyways, here's the questions: 1) Is it true? 2) How do I know it's true? 3) Is it 100% true? (Remember, something that is 75% or 99% true is NOT 100% true) 4) What's the evidence for it being true? 5) What's the evidence against it being true? 6) Has it ever happened before? 7) What's different now? 8) If it were true, how bad would it really be? 9) What's the worst thing that could happen?

I cannot believe this is happening to me and I am taking medication. I woke up shaking sweating and panicking, this has not happened in a long time, usually it takes a few hours after I have had a cup of coffee. I am coughing up mucus and I am scared I have TB or lung cancer my son had a cold and I want to believe its that, I just recovered from my kidney infection and now this. Also I have had no appetite for weeks and I am losing weight with stomach pain and nausea and I think I have a ulcer or pancreatic cancer, I cannot believe anxiety can cause all this, I really believe I have some horrible diseases and I am dying. My husband said I need an "asylum" my best friend told me to "not call till I am better" my family does not know what to say, even my e-mail partner who suffers from panic, anxiety and depression wrote me a harsh cruel e-mail, saying "I am toxic" and I distressed her, even through when she was going through this I helped her and was very supportive, I fear I am going back to that horrible place 4 years ago when I become agorophobic and practically could not leave my bed, my husband is not going to take it this time and I am so afraid he will leave me,, I am so sick and I do not know what to do. There are so many things wrong, I cannot stop shaking, I am taking the Paxil and I see no difference and I just took 1/2 klonopin which I do not like to do during the day because it tends to cause depression, my nurse it out of town till after labor day, am I going to be alright? I feel like I am dying today, it has been leading up to this point even through I have prayed and prayed it would not, I am begging God to help me, panic, depression anxiety and health anxiety its killing me my husband says my mind is going to kill me, can this disorder kill you? I must be pretty bad if my e-mail partner has cut me off when she has this, she did not even wish me a happy birthday, which is not important, I was just not expecting such a harsh mean letter I thought I could confide in her since she has this. Will I ever get better? I think I have some cancer eating away at my body, I am so afraid I will not be able to leave the house again, this all started when my husband left his job and started another, I should be supportive not like this. I am sorry this is so