Wow, I'm impressed. Very nice work. It doesn't sound silly at all, it sounds smart. If you wanted to really go crazy with embracing the garage you could even post inspiring pictures and items...anything to change your association.So far did your cleaning and working help?
Hi Ashley! I decided to go out there and force myself to "embrace" the garage! Sounds silly!! But, the forced time working and cleaning out there alone was good for me. I am trying to make new associations and after all it's a place to park my car....right? :-) Not going to let it be a trigger anymore.
And yes! Self talk is a wonderful thing as long as it's positive. Negative self talk can be very damaging so I'm staying positive.
Triggers can hit at any time. It sounds like you handled it very well. So now you know the garage is a possible trigger for you. How can you put more safety nets around this area? It certainly sounds like the self talk is working well for you.
Triggers are funny things and you're right, they come in all shapes and sizes. While they can take you by surprise, they are also pointers to the problems we need to resolve and, as TS points out, they are learned behaviours so they can be unlearned and re-developed and not bug you anymore. They may seem shocking and uncomfortable at first, however, if we embrace them we can use them to our advantage because each time we overcome the trigger we re-wire ourselves a little more. Treat them as tests and crush them! They are just thoughts so they can't hurt you. Most often it is the anticipation of the resolution (re-watch The Dopamine effect video as it describes some of the neuro-chemical efffects). I posted a link to a site that is very helpful in learning about how the brain learns and it gets into the addiction process. Really interesting so have a read, (http://thebrain.mcgill.ca/avance.php) especially the link to Pleasure and Pain. People learn in a very specific and natural way and it becomes easy to see how we can get caught up in alcohol and drug addiction when we understand the process. We didn't start out with an alcohol problem, we learned it through repetitive conditioning (unbeknownst to us) in an effort to cope the stress and fear in our lives. If you think about how often we have a dopamine response (a completely natural process) to situations in our lives it becomes obvious why everything can be trigger. The incredibly good news is we can re-condition ourselves and neutralize these learned behaviours with new ones and improved coping strategies. Great topic ND. Very relevant.
Hi TS! Thank you for your kind words. I have enjoyed reading your posts and thoughts as well. You and Dave were the first to reach out to me on here and I am so grateful. And you are so supportive of everyone and I like the way you frame things/look at things/think.
You make a great point about the garage. At my friends homes and my home the garage and deck were drinking "hangouts" for me. I also went there when things got hard for me and when sad. In fact now that I think about it when I had a miscarriage I sat in there and made calls to tell family. So, I don't know why I was surprised. I just didn't see it coming--but I should have.
So I've been thinking about triggers and where they hide and I think they are not only places but people. Like my ex husband or when my mother is involved in anything! I think if consider all the possibilities it will help me face them and keep that web from rebuilding in my brain--ever. ( that's how I look at binge drinking. Like a web my brain built.
A disfunctional, distructive, selfish web that I've knocked down.
Really do not consider the "garage" an unusual trigger at all. I quit smoking many years ago and so when any smoker, including my husband, wanted to indulge, out to the garage they went. I totally followed them. Watched thunder storms, snow falling, fire works, snow bowling, snow boarding, snow bowling, tree cutting...you name it... all from the garage with drink in hand. In winter we had heavy duty heaters going and in summer there was a fan if needed. But the most ubiquitous thing was booze. Always looked back on those times as pleasurable and who wouldn't want to relive pleasure!??
Fortunately...I guess...my new home has no garage. In other words, one less trigger. Totally a learned behavioral thing. One of many reasons why giving up alcohol is so difficult. Good on you ND for your successes! You are a total inspiration and you buoy me through my struggles.
Love reading your posts and am grateful you joined this site.
Hi All! I wrote in my blog about this but, wanted to get your feedback.
Have any of you experienced strange triggers?
Here's what happened to me......Yesterday while cleaning out the garage I felt a twinge not a push but a twinge to drink but, later that day felt it again while going into the grocery store. I didn't act on the urge at all and infact did some self talk--"No that's a bad idea. You don't do that anymore" kind of stuff and it went away but, it made me realize that my triggers are not all discovered. I used to hide and drink in the garage. It was a place I went to be alone and could drink and smoke (I don't smoke---not since January 2012) Anyway, being in the garage in my 'corner' gave me a twinge and urge a bad feeling in my belly and made me have a little anxiety attack. Like I was scared. I didn't tell anyone because it all seemed so strange. But, I'm telling you now I don't understand where it came from unless it's just that I hadn't experienced being in the garage yet since giving up the drinking so my AV was trying to see if we could rekindle something and my brain was like NO! WTH are you thinking!??!! BUT, it made me think. Where else do I have a trigger? I feel like I delt with this and won't have the problem again but, it really made me think and disturbed me that i would react as I did. Thoughts???
