Congrats on putting it down again so quickly. One thing I've become more aware of in my short time here is to stop looking at any occasion on which I may drink as a capitulation. Just because I drank yesterday does NOT mean I am doomed to drink again today (but it's still up to me to pass on the drinks...).
Your family and mine sound familiar (with me also being the worst of the "high-functioning drinkers").
Thanks everyone. So I made it 11 days, then had drinks with family over weekend. My family really likes to drink and is full of "high-functioning" drinkers, though I am probably the worst of them all. Overall I have drank 4 days of the last 20 since I started here. I do feel better this way and am performing better at work. My irritability is better. But I know I probably need to get to abstinence. My job is very busy and makes AA difficult. I could go sometimes but not consistently. That is my excuse for not going I guess. Overall this small community has helped a lot. I am back on day 3 now, but it is getting easier.
I think you answered your own questions. I ran into a guy in prison who got right back where he left after a long period of abstinence. Thought he could handle couple of joints here and there. Pretty soon he was doing drugs and other stuff. Got so violent and had to be committed again.
And about channeling your addictive nature elsewhere, have you visited any AA meetings. There are thousands of people where you live are in the same boat. They getting into recovery, recovered. So you could be of immense help to others. Your life can revolve around recovery. This is a selfish selfcentered disease. Guess what the solution is? Being selfless.
This is going to sound crazy, but is substituting marijuana a good idea? The MJ crowd feels strongly that it is much safer than alcohol, but I could also see the two going hand-in-hand for an addictive personality like me. Also, is that a thing? The addictive personality? If you have it, how do you channel bad habits (which are easy and lazy) to good habits (which take hard work). Lots of questions tonight. Thanks for any answers !! This is a pretty nice place.
Foxman is right. I also wanted to share with you that I suffer from anxiety and depression, and when I quit drinking I felt very emotional, irritable, and uncomfortable. It wasn't until I took Foxman's advice on how to get a handle on my emotions and dealing with life in a different way that I was freed from the turmoil. Now, while I still sometimes feel emotional and a bit depressed, I have a much different way in which I handle these feelings, so it doesn't linger like before, and I'm able to stay away from alcohol while in the midst of the sadness and frustration.
I suggest you ask and read anything Foxman shares with you. He is full of resources and is a great help.
Yeah, drinking and these zolofts didn't help me. Toward the end of drinking carrier I was drinking over 50mg Zoloft. After sobering up and staying sober using the 12 steps I slowly weaned off.
You are talking about being irritable, it could be part of un-treated alcoholism. We in AA use the 12 steps to overcome the malady. Accept our situation and work on amending the past and present. So we could have a serene life where the need for drinking doesn't arise. Today I dont obsess about alcohol at all and also comfortable while others drink. Before I would be so scared to be around alcohol. Later realized if the inside is right, outside can't deter us.
my shrink told me that alcohol is stronger than any drug he can prescribe me for depression. this was a real eye opener for me. deep down i knew that alcohol was fueling and fanning my depression. it isn't the cause, but it sure isn't the solution. anyway, i have been dry for 1 week (yeah!) but find myself very irritable. i am on high dose of zoloft, probably because the alcohol blunted it or made it less effective. Other than having bursts of irritability and short bursts of anger, for the most part i really am better. I just hope this irritability does not may me start drinking again. I see the shrink in 1 week and am going to talk about weaning down the zoloft. anyone else with experience in this regard? thanks