Hi Hugs and Shari,
Thank you for your kind words. I haven't finished the program yet, I kind of got stuck on section 4. I'm not suicidal anymore but the one thing that got me through was a little voice, my own voice, that always shouted above the suicidal thoughts. It told me not to move, just stay still, one night when I thought about it when my parents were asleep. I was so amazed at how powerful it was.
I did feel like I was having a breakthrough when I started planning for university again. But those thoughts came back again yesterday when my Dad came home with a broken leg. He was working on a friend's house when he fell off the ladder and since no one was there and he didn't have a phone, he drove home himself. When Mum told me, I was worried if I looked at his leg, I would be sick. I freaked out so much I actually fainted, which I tend to do when someone is injured. I felt so hopeless and pathetic because I couldn't put my own worries aside to bandage Dad's leg using my first aid training. My dream is to become a doctor or do medical research, and my passion for this was always what kept me going. I could see myself wearing that white coat and helping people get better.
Hugs, there are some very nice avatars. I love painting and art, especially lanscapes and the pictures are beautiful. My little bird never fails to make me laugh with his antics. One day all he wanted to do was play, but I wanted to get my lunch and no matter what I tried, he wouldn't get in his cage. So I said to him, "Oi ****head, get in your cage." and he piped up and said, "Hello ****head" I suppose I deserved that one! Haha
Thank you, it makes me so happy to think you find me inspiring. I see you guys as the inspiring ones!
Kaitie.