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Body so Sensitized

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 6252

Good morning Debora.

How are you, and I mean that not just a platitude. If you are not well how can you make it better? I see you sliding back into the negative. thinking too much about how bad you feel and how you will never get better. I see you loading your day and memory with all this negative and not leaving room for any positive. I bet even when you relax you are thinking negative. It is a bad habit and you need to get out of it. And do it not just think you should.

Listen to sunny. She is doing more than just being friendly and supportive. It is imperative that you find something positive in every moment since you are so conditioned to think otherwise it is going to be very hard to do. I know that and you know that so you can't use that for an excuse, that is just the negative talking to you. Even if you try your hardest to break this habit you will still only get a little positive but even that little is something to build on. You can make it better, at least twice as good by coming here and telling us every good moment you have. Every thing you do to counter the negative. Writing it and especially writing it here will get it into your memory where it will do some good. You can still vent but what will make me smile is if you post also what you are doing to counter it. Not just that you are trying but what you are doing. Give sunny something positive to help you with and she will. Give us nothing and we have nothing to work with. We can't help you then. And not for lack of wanting too, we just have nothing to work with.

Davit.

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1665

Hi Debora: Tension/stress headaches common? yes they are even for people without the anxiety disorder. Just think of all the headache tablets available in the marketplact. Do you drink enough water during the day? Dehydration can cause headaches. I found fresh air very important too. I used to get those headaches during my stressful times. I found going for a little walk and getting fresh air very helpful. Some days I could walk farther than others, but that was o.k. as long as I got out every day, rain or shine. It's too easy to stay put in the house and make excuses why you can't go out. I know, I've been there too.

I wouldn't think the negative thought of having headaches, I would think and celebrate the positive thought that my tummy was feeling better! Yippee! Think of the positives D. You've come forward already. Change the negative worry of your symptoms to positive about how it is getting better every day. You'll never go back to how you were because now you know more about it and the CBT program is showing you how to's. You can recognize the pitfalls along the way, you can steer clear of that negative thinking pattern about symptoms. Concentrate on the positive things you will do today, even if it is just a bit because you are still feeling tired out. That's o.k. don't forget to reward yourself for all the things you do accomplish. Rewards are a positive reinforcement for this new way of thinking.

Ignore the negative thoughts and hang onto the positive thoughts, :-)

cheering for you D.

Sunny

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 542

Thanks Sunny for you're encouraging reply, You are correct my body is exhausted from the months of panic, I feel like I weigh 800 pounds! Today I felt very tired, I get bad broken up sleep, whats worrying me is the headache I have had for 3 days, it comes and goes and does not respond to tylenol its like someone is squeezing the sides of my head! I dont normally get too many headaches mostly my stomach gets the hardest hits, did you get alot of headaches too? My eyes and head hurt alot lately, I have been reading and watching TV more but that should not cause headaches should it? I am trying not to dwell on it and hope they go away, its like my tummy settled down somewhat and now its the head?! Can andrenaline cause headaches? I keep hoping and praying these body symptoms if not go away will lessen, it causes me some anxiety and then I get sad, but I will keep trying to go on.

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 1665

HI Debora: Good to hear you have some improvement, not having attacks every day. That's great. Your body is pretty worn out from all the excess adrenalin, etc. Don't forget to pamper yourself today. Do one or two things you love and enjoy. You sound more hopeful in your posts and that's moving forward. Good for you. Even baby steps count for moving ahead.

Keep the faith and believe,

Sunny

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 542

Hi Jdoe and Hugs!

On my birthday I did NOT feel old it was like any other day, my husband even made a joke "welcome to old age" and I acutally laughed, 3 weeks later I was NOT laughing, I got so sick one thing after another, first I got a terrible flu that lasted over a week then bad broncitis from it, I just recovered from that when I had an ovarian cyst burst, terribly painful and scary, then another relaspe of broncitis right after that, if that were not enough I got a small blood clot in my leg and this all happend in less than 2 months, all these things in seven weeks! That is when I had my meltdown, I did alright over last years holidays but in january it came back full force and has not quit yet, I guess I cannot believe how long its gone on almost a year now and I am scared since its been so long "will I ever recover" The health anxiety led to horrible daily panic attacks then that led to agorophobia and then black depression, I was always crying or panicking, that has eased up somewhat but now I am left with all day anxiety {worrying about sickness and dying} and body symptoms, bad bad headaches, eyestrain and stomachaches, probably all due to worrying and nerves, the agorophobia and depression are still lingering, It seems to have lessened a little but not enough for me to function and live, this really takes awhile to get better from and I get so upset because people want the old me back, not half as much as I do, if for no other reason for my family to take care of them.

I am trying so hard to recover, sometimes I feel pressured by people {not on this site of course} just people in my life, I do NOT like being a coward and scared all the time, I use to be so strong and now I feel so weak tired and sick, I just have to hope and pray that one day I can live again, the people on this site give me hope, I dont want to panic or cry anymore, its a terrible terrible way to live, its not even living and I would not wish it on anyone. May be all recover and help one another.

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 2508

Debora,
It's good to hear you were able to get a little done today..You are making the effort to get well and this is great.. In answer to some of your questions..I am post menopausal and have some other health issues related to it.. Yes I do get very tired and it takes me days to get my work done. I have slowed down over the last few years and I am getting better at accepting this..I don't like it but I decided it's really ok if it takes me longer to do what I want or have to do..I do have some problems with my short term memory now and my focus isn't as good as it used to be..Nothing major yet..I read on line that this is common for women that are post menopausal..it used to worry me until I took my first quilting class and talked to the other women there and they pretty much all say they have noticed these changes too..In fact they joke about it..So don't worry you are not losing your mind there are lots of us going through the changes that women go through as they age..and yes my hair looks terrible and I complain about it every day..To my partner..He says his mother felt the same way about her hair and now that I think about it my mother worried about her hair and wrinkles every day too...None of us like these changes thats for sure...But this does not mean we can not enjoy our lives. We just have to work a little harder at it..and rest when we need to.

Please excuse my spelling and grammar errors..I can't write as well as I used to...

You will be in my prayers,

Red.....

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 4027

Debora,

I had to log back on to reach out to you. It's so rewarding to be able to touch someone like you, who are so thankful and gracious.

It's probably not accurate to say you're bringing people down, since we're probably mostly feeling compassion, and that is a great gift for us...CBT usually cautions that sort of thinking called "mindreading".

"50" is the new "40", so you have time to live!

As for those who you believe have a lot more energy...they probably do, but don't have your/our obstacles

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 542

Thanks JDoe, It was nice to read I had a positive effect on someone that was nice to hear, thanks. Lately I feel like I am bringing everyone, including myself down so that made my day too. I tried to do some housework today, mopping vacum, etc....I get so tired so quickly do you too? I had a bad headache and blurry vision but worked through it somehow. I did not know you were a woman till I read one of your other posts. Are you have trouble with peri-menopause too? maybe you are not old enought, I noticed when that started the panic depression and scary thoughts started again, I know there must be some correlation, I went awhile without a full blown attack, then I relapsed again last week, so far this week so good, but I still feel very very anxious {health anxiety terrible} and very tired and wiped out, I did not think I would feel so wrung out at only 50 years old, I know people older than me and they have SO much energy, always running, traveling, happy, and here I am afraid to leave my house most of the time, I dont want to waste anymore time being so afraid, I am missing out on life and I so want, my hope and prayer is to join the living again. I look very bad right now very tired and sick so I dont go out much.

I hope and pray for all of us on this site for us to get our lives back and be happy and live, life should be enjoyed, not just endured, I just pray this ends more quickly for me I wasted so much time already, I am glad you are doing good! YEA!

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 2508

Good morning Debora,

I was reading your post last night and hearing you say you felt happy and hopeful made my day..Your positive look on it is rubbing off on me too..I really do believe we will feel better in the days to come and as we start to feel better we will get healthy again.

I agree this disorder is so hard sometimes. If we just take it one day at a time and start out small..Like a nice shower in the morning and a lite breakfast..This is a start..and we can slowly build from there..

Also I want to let you know I am one of the ones here that can't and doesn't take meds except for Valium occasionally to help me sleep because the bad dreams won't let me sleep and cause me to panic while sleeping..

Anyway I want to let you know that there is real hope and that CBT really helps.It just takes time thats all..I am here again working on my issues and fine tuning myself so to speak..I find that I need a refresher from time to time..Just so that I don't slip back...I also read the sessions in their sister site "the depression center" thats where I started before I came here..One thing the program there talks about is pleasant activities and how important it is to have pleasant activities in your life..It can be as simple as taking a long shower or a nice soak in the tub for example..Or reading a chapter of a book or looking at a magazine...your get the idea..Just small steps..Slow and easy wins the race...You can come here and post your pleasant activities if that helps you..Thats what I did today..because it helps me with my positive thinking...

Well I go to go for now.. Get some coffee and get to that long hot shower I was talking about...

Red......

for 13 år siden 0 +0 / -0 542

Thanks Bren.

I have discussed this with my primary care physcian and unfortunetly no help there! He is just good with the physical not the emotional, when I told him I took a low-dose klonopin he looked at me like I said I took heroin or something! He would never prescribe it I know, I guess he figures I see a nurse-practioner for the meds and a therapist and he just looks after the physcial, I dont know, I wish I could take the antidepressants Bren but the vomiting nausea and dizziness was just too much it was even worse than panic if you can believe that, I was actually bed-ridden they made me so sick, for MOST people they do NOT do that so I do not want to scare anyone its just me I am very med-sensitive, I remember how sick they made me and just the "thought" of taking them sends me panicking! I guess I just have to stick with the CBT and klonopin for now.

I am a little shaky today, bad dreams about sickness and stuff, I woke up anxious and trying to deal with it. JDOE I was reading you're posts and good for you! You got alot done and got out there and faced the world and you're fears and have plans to do more, that makes me so happy and hopeful! I hope in the coming days both of us can feel better and get healthy again. This disorder is so hard sometimes isn't it? I guess one day at a time, if I could remove the fear and worry I would be so much better, easier said than done I know. I just have to believe I will get my life back again and join the living again.

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