When I stop smoking for an extended period, say a couple hours, I begin feeling the same symptoms as a PA. It's pretty unique, in the sense that all I have to do to face myself having a PA in public now is quit smoking for 3-4 hours.
I noticed this today when I unintentionally ran out of money, and had to go through what I'm currently going through. Also came to the realization that I really don't have much fear left for panic attacks. Not that I've conquered it, I still have to face it regularly and still have much to overcome and learn...but the time in between attacks I've noticed a big change in my overall confidence and, well, how to play with my temperament rather then let it play me.
I get to see other peoples reaction when anxiety hits, and how little it matters to them. They see, some care, some think it's weird, but in the end, as long as I accept it, they seem to be generally really accepting as well. Well the cool ones do, the rest either brush it off like raindrops off a windshield and don't hold it against me, or are crazy themselves and hold anything they can against me.
I guess my point is, I can see clearly now the rain is gone. So what's next? Really, once you give up care for the anxiety, know it'll come back, but don't care....I've had anxiety problems for over 5 years now...I'm so deeply ingrained in this...I don't know where I'm going with this anymore...
The only thing I do know, is that I'm not stopping...that's where my problem began. Besides, I don't want to give up, I'm just confused.
