Hi Cori J,
I am glad that you have decided to post and share with us what you are going through. It sounds like you have a lot of different things going on right now. Hopefully it will be therapeutic for you to get things off your chest and share them with people who support you. We are all a group of individuals who support each other here.
I would suggest that you take a look through our program; there is a wealth of knowledge on a variety of topics that would be of benefit to you. There are sections on relationships, resolving disputes to name a few.
Hey everybody. I’ve just been lurking in the background for a while, getting lost in my thoughts and all the crap going on. I’ve been having a hard time dealing with a lot of stuff here. I haven’t had a panic attack in about two weeks now. Yay! But the stress seems overwhelming sometimes. My doctor is trying to find a counselor for me to talk to.
I’ve been fighting with my boss trying to get my hours back. The manager at my job decided (without ever talking to me) that I had an attitude problem, and chopped my hours in half. And since finances are a lot of my stress, this skyrocketed. I finally had to explain to them both everything that I’m dealing with, and that it’s not work I have a problem with – it’s life in general!
As well as all that crap, my bf and I have been dealing with a custody case for his son. This has been going on for over a year now, and it’s been really stressful and it hurts a lot too. Now pile on all the stress working for my brother, and you have one mess of a person.
My bf doesn’t quite understand what I’m feeling either. He’s getting frustrated and telling me it’s all in my head, I’m a hypochondriac, and I just want attention. He says he’s never seen anybody with so many problems. That cuts me deep; I need his support now more than ever!
I’ve decided to stir the s**t pot and I wrote my brother a letter. I haven’t sent it yet, but I told him basically I’m not hiding behind secrets and pretend lives anymore. I need to move on, and he needs to know where I stand. I’ve left the door open to him to reconcile if he wants. He’s family whether I like it or not. And I want peace. I’ve also told him not to come to my workplace. I can’t handle it. It’s too hard to try and be happy and deal with customers when I want to throw up and spaz out.
I also got my bf to read the letter I wrote to my brother, so he understands a bit more of my past, and why my head is so messed up. Some days I just want to hide in a hole and never come out. Too bad real life gets in the way of that. Anyways, that’s my vent for the day. Thanks for listening.
~Corinna