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negative emotions


for 16 år siden 0 538 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I find in the long run that challenging my thoughts helps bring about change in my emotions. I accept the emotion but I challenge the thoughts.
for 16 år siden 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh, the shades of gray - I don't have any of those either.  I need to go to the paint store and get some of those little cards with gray hues on them and post them on my mirror, etc.  Black and white just doesn't seem open-minded, but I am open-minded, just see things one way or the other.  I apply this in practical life as well.  I realize there is more than one way to skin a cat (not that I do that) but I also can't see beyond the way I do it, even though there may be an easier, better, more effective way. Am I making any sense?
 

for 16 år siden 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I find challenging negative thoughts very difficult. The idea seems great when I am feeling 'up', but when I am in the grip of my old dark demon the last thing I can do is step back, be objective/rational/compassionate, and challenge how I am thinking and feeling.
My negative thoughts are generally about myself, my life up to now, my shortcomings of character and strength ... all that tiresome stuff. When I'm in a blue, it seems as if I am thinking clearly, and that there is abundant evidence for what I am telling myself. Very hard to challenge what feels, at the time, like cast-iron and self-evident truth. I suppose it is the self-loathing that grows from this hyperawareness of my own imperfections and failures that I must really challenge and beat.
 
I think I must acknowledge, not deny, my shortcomings and imperfections, but find a way to stop hating myself for falling short of what I think I should be, a way to accept myself for who I am, as I accept others. I'm nowhere near as critical of other people as I am of myself, don't expect others to be without faults, but I find it hard to forgive faults in my own self.
 
Shades of grey, must accept shades of grey, not just black and white.....
for 16 år siden 0 823 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Rosie,   You are right in that it is difficult to challenge your negative thoughts and to separate emotions from thoughts.  In my opinion, it is never a good idea to suppress your emotions because that only drives them deeper into your being and eventually they will resurface. Sometimes they will re-emerge uglier than before so it is probably wiser to "feel" the negative emotions but to recognize that they are in the moment. Do not dwell or brood over them. Allow yourself to ride the wave and then let it go. This takes practice and also gives you the control, not the other way around.   Rose has some great suggestions. And your idea about embracing negative emotions rather than fighting them sounds less tiring.   Keep working through the program because it will allow you to learn a lot about yourself and your coping strategies.   Good luck and keep us posted!     Faryal, Health Educator
for 16 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hi rosie, i try to wait out the storm in another room or off by myself. when anger or depression gets ahold its hostility or tears. i guess i can't fight them or head them off at the pass. it's probably always a good idea to keep repeating positive things, but you're right it seems pretty fruitless in the moment. i think we have little control over our emotions but we need to think of them as passing and not carved in stone. and then to always try to find that elusive balance and stop beating ourselves up. my 2 cents
for 16 år siden 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I am working on my thought records where I am challenging my negative thoughts. It says in the program that you can't change your emotions but you can change your thoughts. I find that when I start experiencing a negative emotion (such as anger or sadness), I try to fight the emotion rather than my thoughts that got me to that emotion. Then I try and think positive but by that time I feel overwhelmed by my emotions and feel like 'thinking positive' is rather pointless. I tend to try and fight my negative emotions, like I shouldn't be feeling them. Should I stop fighting them and embrance them? Will the emotion pass then? Should I repeat positive stuff to myself while I am wrapped up in the negative emotions or just experience it and wait for the calm after the storm? Am kind of confused about this one....

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