Hmmm it makes sense things are becoming harder now that you aren't talking about what you are going through as openly. Talking about things can be so helpful if not essential. Perhaps this support group can start to be a bit of an outlet for you. I noticed there are quite a few new members here. It might be helpful for you to check out some other threads as well as posting here. The more you can connect with others here the better your results will be.
Feeling tired all the time is a really tough symptom of depression. It can make recovery seem impssible. But it is not. I think it is amazing that you are posting here and striving to work on it even though you feel so tired. That takes incredible determination and resilience. With those qualities you will get through this. Be easy on yourself when you feel you need a break. This will take time - you deserve to take your time with this if you feel you need to.
It also sounds like there are some concrete negative thoughts that need challenging. Them telling you how great you are doing is a great thing! This program will help you to systematically challenge these negative thoughts. You are not a failure at all. It sounds to me like you are a kind hearted, thoughtful person and often times these people can be most at risk. It also sounds like you are a fighter. Sometimes even the strongest people need some maintanance.
How do you think your life will be different once this anxiety and depression is more in control? How do you expect your life to change? Be as concrete as possible.
I think the reason why I overcame my other challenges was due to the huge support I had at the other school. They helped me and listened a lot. I was even told that I brought others down in the past, even though they were supportive. Therefore being at a new environment, nobody knew me so I withdrew from others or just told them everything was fine when in reality, I was getting deeper and deeper in my hopelessness. I wanted a fresh start and start being more positive. I held everything in and only talked about a bit of my issues at work. They kept telling me how I was so good at my job that I started to feel like I wasn't measuring up to their expectations. I was feeling more and more like a failure until one day I just couldn't cope. I hate conflict so I was just getting deeper in my negative thoughts instead of solving some real problems at work. I just couldn't solve anything and felt like I wasn't being heard or taken seriously. I feel like I just ended up losing myself. I am trying to find the things that make me happy and trying to get my strength back. I am tired all the time and it takes great effort to eat. I am working on it the best way I can.
I have already responded to your other thread. The only question I want to add here. In the past, when you overcame challenges how did you cope? How did you overcome them?
First I want to apologize for posting in the forum before introducing myself. I haven't done this before.
I am a person who has always been a perfectionist, high-achiever, worrier. I have always been hard on myself and I don't talk about my feelings with others except for a select few. I have a hard time expressing myself and always make others think that everything is fine. Now, I don't have the strength to continue on like that. I am struggling with this and I'm trying to make myself better. My body is telling me to stop with all these physical problems. I am unable to ignore the fact that I can't cope. I have always felt like I had the blues for as long as I can remember. I have dealt with all types of challenges in my past and I have always overcome them. This time was different. I find it even more difficult now that I am in a new job description, at a new place with new co-workers. It is affecting my personal life with all these challenges I am facing with this new experience. I am not a new teacher, I have been teaching for 11 years. However, with all the challenges, I feel like everything about me has changed. I started session 1 and I relate completely with what I read. I hope having this extra support will help me better understand what I am going through and how to help me get better.