Before I quit smoking, I was a bitter person. I allowed animosity and failures in my life to create a wall of protection around me. No one got in and I didn�t come out. Something about quitting put a crack in that wall of protection and over a period of time my wall came crumbling down. The crack in the wall came from reaching out to people on this site to help me through the tough times. Prior to the SSC, I dealt with everything on my own and leaned on the cigarette to get me through WHATEVER issues came my way.
Well, now what? I don�t smoke and not only that, but my wall of protection is gone. It took me years to build it and now it is gone because during my quit process I moved beyond it. (I believe they call this process growth.) The crutch of smoking really is gone. So now when people disappoint me, when situations seem impossible, or when emotions get the best of me it can be difficult to know what to do next.
In the past, I always grabbed a cigarette, took five minutes out, ignored the emotions and moved forward. Today my process of dealing with the things life throws my way is much different. Today, I start by taking deep breaths, and then I take some more. I write in my journal, and I reach out to my friends. I do not feel as alone as I did as a smoker. I go for a walk, go to the driving range, play a round of golf, throw in an exercise tape, read a book or simply sit and cry for a while. All of these things are what I do to get through life. They are my new found coping skills.
It is ok [B]not[/b] to know how to deal with things because that knowledge will come as the quit progresses. It is ok to want to give up, just don�t do it. Keep taking one step at a time no matter what comes your way.
Let the bitterness and the resentment go people. That is what kept me alone for many years and attributed to many failures in my life. The bitterness and resentment kept me from progressing forward (personal growth) and enjoying life. Use the negative emotions to push you forward. Negative feelings have forced me to try different things to get out of my funks. You have to be a fighter in order to maintain the quit. You have to be willing to reach out, to try things to make yourself feel better regardless of what others