Hi David
I do not really know if moving will change anything. I recently wanted to do that, thinking that a change in scene might be better. I have since realized that it does not matter where I am my brain goes with me and that is where the depression stays.
With regards to everything slipping at the moment and your not having energy. I found that doing and starting at the small things always makes you feel better. Not because you have necessarily sorted something out, but because you have STARTED. I know it might sound simple, but why don't you make a list of everything you need to do. Keep this list and put dates to it. Look at this list every morning and if you did something the previous day mark that off. The list might grow as you go along, but at least you will see that something is also making the list shorter.
Sorry my friend, but as for the energy, you just have to force yourself. I have not found a table or pill that would help me have the energy to start doing something. For the last four months I have had to TELL myself to get up and go to work. What is helping me extremely at the moment is that before I start work I come to the office, and visit this web-site and try to help and also to receive help.
Please understand me correctly. I am not saying pull yourself together. I hate that, but I am saying FORCE yourself to start somewhere. If it is a serious problem between you and your partner at the moment explain to them that you are trying to get better but it will not happen overnight and ask her to help you with the list. Just do not let her take over the list. I found that if you have someone who knows what you are planning, it sometines gives you that extra motivation, which it is so easy to lose having depression.
Sorry, one last thing. I do not know the circumstances under which your sister committed suicide. Dealing with something like this is not always easy, because we do sometimes blame ourselves for whatever reason. I am not fatalistic, but that was her choice. You must respect that choice, but nt necessarily accept that choice. You might be told by one of the support specialist that you should ignore the next line. Your sister had to be going through hell to take such a radical step. We should know that when we get ther