I had a similar situation with my mom who kept telling me to "let go of the past" and to just "pick myself up by my bootstraps" and other similar cliches. Finally I asked her to come to my psychologist's office with me. He explained to her that my depression is biological and I can no more talk or think myself out of it than I can talk or think myself out of being diabetic. It really changed her attitude. I don't know if this would work with your boyfriend but sometimes if someone else can explain it, people are more likely to understand. Just a thought.
Yes there is a great book called the road less travelled, and the second bok is called the road less travelled and beyond.
my advice is to read the book but i agree with the previous post..
How are you going to get better if your boyfriend blames you for the depression?
Depression is a very nasty thing and you cannot assign blame for it! So many things can cause it or it can happen without any triggers.
You cannot ignore it and you do need to deal with it, but you need some support from people- Is your new boyfriend going to do that for you?
For a personal reading try "Undoing Depression" by Richard O'Connor Ph.D
It is written as a self help book but is full of information that can be understood with out the necessity of a college education.
I do not believe your boyfriends attitude is healthy, but thats my personal opinion.
As a note, I personally do not take advice from a self help book on my own, any information I think may be beneficial is discussed with my counsler or doctor before I act on it. I have several things now I wish to talk to my doctor about during my next appointment.
Hello everyone!
I have major depression and when I decided to talk about it with my new boyfriend a few days ago he started blaming me for not fighting it myself, although I do all I can about it. I see a psychiatrist, take medications, etc. All the things he said made me feel even more sad... Can anyone recommend a book, a site... anything that will give him a good idea about what depression is and what it is not. Most importantly, it has to have information about how are we supposed to treat the people with depression around us - what sort of things we should say or do and what we shouldn't do. Thanks!
