ladyblue42
well iam off the paxil and currently taking 300mg of wellbutrin. i just started it so its not quite working yet. atleast i hope it works better soon b/c i had another episode last week.its gotten pretty severe for the past two weeks i've had 2 suicide attempts and 2 cuttings.this last one is the worst i've ever had in the past 4 years. my thighs ,stomach it hurts to walk and sit but it felt good. i know i need help other than the meds iam just waiting for benifits to kick in,but even when they do it will be knda of embarrasing.i now just wait for what ever way the wind blows me (life). everything i own is in my car so whatever happens i know i wont have a problem dressing for the occasion!!!
I was on Paxil a long time and my depression did not seem to be getting any better. And yes, I continued to be very suicidal while on it. Most of the time I felt blank and empty. When my family doctor hedged about changing my meds, my psychologist asked me to consider seeing a psychiatrist in my area who also has a doctorate degree in pharmacology. He tapered me off the Paxil and put me on Wellbutrin and an anti-anxiety medication called alprazolam. Just recently he added the generic version of Celexa. Most of the time I can hold the suicidal thoughts at bay but the last couple of days have been hard. I had a good cry at my therapist's today and feel a little better. When I was completely off the Paxil I found out that I had a much wider range of emotions, including positive ones.
ladyblue42
thakyou so much for your input it means alot in a world of nothing. today is what i call a peak day its the peak of good before the bad i suspect around thursday the effects of the words of someone close will start to deminish the confidence i have been struggling to build in only a matter of days.yes it's a man how many of you out there stuggle from the physical and verbal abuse of a loved one.its a common thing but its hard to leave under certain curcumstances
we all have our excuses mine ,money there never seems to be enough.ive already lived in my car once.
the cuts on my wrist are a painful daily reminder of how bad its gotten and its pushing me for the better.i ve made an appointment to see my doc and change my medicine because these thoughts of suicide have become more frequent with the start of this medicine and some one told me that paxil can make people more suicidal is this true ladyblue42? or anyone?did you experense this?[color=Blue]ladyblue42[/color]
And I know how stupid it sounds to say "hang in there". There are times when I hurt so badly that when someone says that to me I want to scream "HOW?" I really do not mean to minimize your pain. There are so many cliches out there. I know that I don't know you or exactly what you're going through but I do know that you are young and there is a chance that it will get better. If you kill yourself, there is NO chance. Read Hamlet's siloquoy when he's contemplating suicide. We really don't know if what's waiting for us after this life is any better than what we have now. (Now I'm probably depressing you more...sorry.) I'm an anonymous voice in the wilderness, but I am asking you to live because so many of us with "mental illnesses" are the most intelligent, sensitive, creative people on this earth and there has to be a reason for us being here. That's what I hold on to anyway.
Hi,
When I was on Paxil I felt blank most of the time like I wasn't part of the world around me. I was on it for quite a while before my doctor switched me to Wellbutrin which allowed me to have a much greater range of emotion where on the Paxil, I didn't feel anything good or bad. But that's just me. Everyone reacts differently to medications.
I have also done what you have done, off and on. My arm is just healed from my last episode. I don't want to do it anymore but I know what you mean, sometimes I feel like I would do anything to stop the way I feel inside and the outside pain does that, as twisted as that sounds.
I don't know if it helps but you aren't alone. There are an awful lot of us out here. Hang in there!
Down&out,
You have come to the right place! Please feel free to roam the site at your own pace. If you look to the left of the screen under "TOOLS" you will find our Depression Test. This test is not a diagnostic tool and is not a replacement or substitute for a physician's advice. The purpose of these tests is to prepare you with information that you can present to your physician. When you're finished the test, you can either print your Final Report or email it directly to your doctor.
If you have any question or concerns with our site or please contact Support Department at support@depressioncenter.net. We are open to any questions or concerns you may have.
Looking forward to hearing from you soon!
Melanie
__________________________________
The Depression Center Support Team
i'am 21 severly depressed for about 3 years now not really diagnosed like i see alot of people are. i have been taking this medicine for about 2months and i'am taking 40mg . last week i had a suicide atempt my first real attempt. i took alot of sleeping pills and variety of others but only ended up severly ill.and i guess iam what you call a cutter i used to alot but stopped until last week. i cant take the pain i feel inside. everything is clouded and nothing makes sense i dont talk really anymore i just catch myself drifting into a blank stare. i've been faking so long i'am just tired of it.any answers?
