hi there: I don't understand what is going on with me, I am so lost and so alone , I don't even know if I have depression or I am just playing the victim.
I am an outgoing person, I smile all the time and make everybody's life easy, but when I am alone at home (right now) I can't stop crying and feeling I want to die.
The most stupid little things worry me to death, so much that I can't sleep . For example I have to go in 3 months to an appointment with the doctor and I am so scared about it I couldnt stop crying last night , I cried for hours until I finally slept.
Nobody knows about this problem, i am so confussed. I did try to tell my husband about it but he doesn't seem to understand, he truly believes I am playing the victim and I am a drama queen.
But I don't know anymore , I am so scared to talk about this to a doctor , who could possibly understand how scared I am? , how do you go to the doctor when it is probably your worst fear?.
I am here today because the past 2 weeks have been a complete hell and because last night I catched myself thinking I should probably die and actually saw myself dying by my own hand.
