Hi, girlie.
I know what its like to desperately want help and not be able to afford it. I've been in the same boat as of late. You are not a whiner, Kat. You are just someone who'd is a bad place and doesn't know how to get out and above it.
Is there anything you really enjoy or used to enjoy that you can get out to do? Getting back to the city that I've been successful in recently in the past and being productive with my work and taking time for myself to do things that I ejoy has done me a world of good. Sit down for a minute and thing about the things that you liked to do that gave your life a higher internal meaning...Are you doing those things now? If not, seek them out again.
Love to you...Liz