Hi everyone thanks for for all your posts. I have now been to the docs and it all seems to be moving along ok. He has me on ecitalopram whatever that is, and and referal to a local clinic about the drugs, also he got the local crisis team to ring and talk a few things through with me. As though i am not suicidal i do have a very reduced personal safety threshold right now. also on the partner front some things are changing a bit there as well, we have had a long talk to each other. She says that she will go to Relate together to talk about things there, also that to throw away 17/18years together is wrong. Of cause the stumbling block for me is i can't get the words of the e-mails and texts i found out of my head. She says that she only met him about a month ago and they have only met 3 times but has already replied to his e-mails that she loves him and they have already made love together. now he is married and still with his wife and i don't know if this is him looking for quick sex or lasting love, also its hard to think that just three meetings results in sex. She has told me that she really thought that i did not love or care for her any more, and she had already gone through this 3/4years ago with me,without telling me of course so was so shocked when she found out i did. Anways thanks for lettin me sound off and wellcome to all new people, I hope that you all find this forum as helpfull as i have. I will let you know about the clinic and how i get on with the drugs side, but i am really determined to get off and beat this depression.
