Angella:
Oh sweetheart, you should not have had to go through all that alone. Nor should you have to go through your recovery from it alone. On the boyfriend side, that must hurt like hell too. I know the times I have been in bad shape and needed the support of my significant other was when things got most difficult between us. I am still trying to figure out why, but I do know that the more I needed him, the angrier I got at his absences, and the angrier I got, the more he stayed away (I was angry after all!). I'm not saying it's your fault, how could it be in the circumstances, I am just saying it sounds so familiar to me, and that the fighting must come from a deep place of need and loneliness. And I just wish you all the love and support in the world, and I hope you'll know you deserve it, even if the world (doctors, boyfriends, etc) aren't coughing it up right at the moment.
Ava