Hi Meena
I lost my father about 18 months ago, and I've only just started to be able to accept condolences or even talk about him without tears coming.
He was much older than your mom, and he'd been ill for awhile before he passed away, but we were very much alike. Because we were so alike, we didn't always get along, but he was the only person in my life who truly understood me. Not that I'm terribly complicated, but I never had to explain myself to him, we found the same sort of things interesting, we found the same sort of things funny...
I still miss him a lot and feel very alone, but it's better than it was. I suppose the best advice I got was to let myself grieve however I needed to and for as long as I needed to. Part of me was trying to push myself through the grief -- "stiff upper lip" or "get on with life" sort of thing -- but the rest of me just wouldn't be pushed.
Do you have people around you to support you?
Janice